Figment Soup and Other Random Thoughts

six feet under

2012-02-12T09:57:00.001-06:00

i woke up with six feet under my covers this morning.

two of them belonged to this little noodle head...

and the other two belonged to this little burrito head...

okay - there were actually ten feet because walter was there, too.

especially on a cold, wintery morning, that's one of the best ways i know to wake up!

we are about to dive into some pre-valentines day madness. i think it will be fun...and yummy. or at least (hopefully) one of the two.

hope you've had a great weekend.

peace...

31 magical days

2012-02-09T18:06:00.000-06:00

after reading a post by my friend over at the project queen, i was inspired to download a new nook book.

coincidentally, this fits in beautifully as part of my 'read a book a month outside of grad school' and my 'keep our home a peaceful place to live' goals for my life list.

double. score.

i am always battling a seemingly endless pile of laundry and to-do's, and in the mix of life and mommy-hood, i sometimes forget to keep my eyes on the prize: keeping a happy home for the girls. it's a short read, and i ~~will~~ should be done with it just in time to start a new book in march.

oh, and for the record, i finished water for elephants as my january book. i laughed, i cried, i swooned. i'm trying to keep my goal in place...it would be a shame to miss something that only takes 11 months, right?

so here we go...diving head first into new domestic territories...i'll try to keep you updated. wish me luck!

peace and domestic bliss...

skinny

2012-02-09T09:06:00.002-06:00

we had a fish funeral today. i was pretty convinced that skinny was the longest-living betta in the history of bettas.

he meant the world to cee, and for her, i am sad he's gone.

we're marking the cause of death as old age, although cee is pretty sure he had cancer (which is her new current medical obsession).

there really weren't any adequate words for his eulogy. we tried, but we weren't eloquent by any means.

dear skinny,
you were a good fish.
you were a smelly fish.
you're a really smelly fish right now.
thank you for being a good fish.
we will never forget you.

{flush}

good bye.

cee is home with me today - after a couple of days of vicious coughing, she has walking pneumonia and strep which is no fun at all. i'm not sure she anticipated having a fish funeral amidst the sickness.

i'm also not sure how we are going to tell jay after school today - she gets very sad about loss and i'm not sure exactly how she'll handle the news.

would fish sticks be an appropriate dinner tonight in honor of our floaty little friend? i think so.

est in peace...

when the emperor speaks, people listen.

2012-02-03T23:34:00.004-06:00

this conversation seriously happened today between 9:38 am and 9:39 am. this is proof that greatness can happen in the course of a minute.

awesome-est kid in the world (as evidence will soon show): miss, you have paper boy in your 7th period class, right?

me: why yes, i do.

awesome-est kid in the world: okay. can you please strongly encourage him to attend a meeting we have tomorrow at noon? he knows where.

me (intrigued): yes...what kind of meeting is it? are you and paper boy having a super secret meeting?

awesome-est kid in the world: well, it's...just...(he's trying to dumb this down for me)...we're both emperors.

me: no way.

awesome-est kid in the world: yes. we're emperors of unrecognized countries. and paper boy and my other friend, who is also an emperor of an unrecognized country, are not seeing eye to eye, and if we don't do something quickly, our worlds are going to collide. and end. so i feel obligated to intervene.

me: i see. is paper boy the emperor of the land of 'i want my two dollars'?

awesome-est kid in the world: no, he's emperor of...

yup. this is as far as i can go because 'awesome-est kid in the world' said things that made my brain back track and regress and assume the fetal position and wonder why i hadn't been the first one to think of staring my own empire.

i did feel immediately compelled to share this crucial tidbit of information with awesome-est kid in the world's current english teacher.

she was already aware of the distress amongst the empires, as awesome-est kid in the world had already sought her input. he told her that he felt caught in the middle of two forces. she advised him to carefully remove himself from the situation, thus requiring the two gentlemen to settle their differences.

his reply?

'you mean peaceful diplomacy.'

for most 7th graders, this would be a question...one that seeks reassurance and needs the boost of confidence from an adult to accept what he already knows to be true.

but not this 7th grader.

his is not a question, but a very simple (yet thoroughly complex) statement.

'you mean peaceful diplomacy.'

it isn't a correction as much as it is a paraphrase in the moment of impending doom of said empires.

i taught awesome-est kid in the world last year, and he has a little sister coming up in the next class of 6th graders.

it is all-out, game-on for who gets little sister of awesome-est kid in the world.

i hope there is peace in your empire...because that's not something you can take for granted...

(obviously).

that's all...

seven.

2012-02-02T21:46:00.009-06:00

for some reason, today was really hard for me (not that this day was about me at all). my youngest baby is growing up, and it seems like we just did this song and dance yesterday. but that was for her sixth birthday. i really need an appointment with father time.

seven years and approximately four hours ago, this scene blessed my world.

from the moment i laid eyes on her, i realized i'd just unveiled a completely different kind of love as a mom. there is truly something unique about the path your soul travels with each of your children, and it's not something you can explain until you meet your second child. and probably the same goes for your third and so on...

when i first started looking at pictures for this post, i was thinking the theme was going to be her smile, because that is her killer secret weapon. but it's about so much more than just that beaming grin that dominates a room.

it's about her spirit and her ability to put people at ease, no matter how thick the tension. it really is one of her natural talents.

and her ability to enjoy a cupcake.

for some reason on her first birthday, i felt wickedly compelled to have my own tradition with her because i think the second child sometimes gets the shaft on tradition and ends up taking what's 'left'...so i got out of bed in the middle of the night to make a secret batch of cupcakes and i vowed to wake up before her the next morning so that i could be in her room when she first stirred...and the rest is history.

call me mom of the year, but please don't call cps. each morning on her birthday, jay and i dine on a true breakfast of champions: cupcakes. that's how we roll.

as i've said many times before, she is such a free spirit with a true hippie heart. this is one of her favorite pictures of herself...and please don't assume that it was taken in october.

nope, just your run-of-the-mill march morning. she loves animals, and she loves fur. this is undoubtedly going to present a quandary of conflicts of interest down the road, and i will hold her hand through those as they present themselves. in the meantime, i figure that it isn't a bad thing to catch this smile as often as i can because that...combined with her eyes...well, there isn't much that combination can't fix in my world.

my nature girl loves all living things (trust me, i've tried to set limits here), and she still talks about our chickens (that we haven't had in three years) like they are her friends. she is also still baffled by the concept of buying them from the store instead of getting them off the grill on the back porch like laura ingalls wilder (minus the grill).

she is the most compassionate and empathetic little love bug i could have ever imagined, and she has a magical way of always keeping other people's feelings ahead of her own. i don't think that is something you can teach people...i think it is an amazing gift, and i can't wait to see how she uses that as she gets older.

there are so many amazing blessings she has that are so not easy for me to explain. her smile really has pulled me through some of my most difficult times, and her ability to size up a situation and know how to put you almost instantly at ease is honestly uncanny sometimes.

i have let myself spend hours at a time thinking about how i got lucky enough to be the mom of two amazing girls and wondering exactly what my role is in helping them prepare for the incredible roles and lives i know lie ahead of them.

every now and then, i get a tiny revelation, and it usually brings another entirely new round of questions. and that's what makes life fabulously interesting.

here's the last picture i have for you tonight...this is the look she gets on her face when she's either sizing up a situation or is about to tell you something really important.

i got this look earlier today. we were coming home from the grocery store, and she got 22 points from her heb buddy bucks. i said to her, 'that's pretty cool that you got 22. on your birthday, which is 2/2. because if you break 22 down, it comes out to 2-2...like 2 for february and 2 for the 2nd...'

(yes, i realize i'm a nerd)

and then she gives me the 'new' look and simply says, 'mom. it's called expanded notations.'

and that's where i still need a little more practice on figuring out what my role is in helping them prepare for the incredible roles and lives i know lie ahead of them.

happy birthday to my sweet jay bird...and many, many more! being your mom is one of the most incredible honors i've ever had, and i promise you: i'm giving it my all.

peace...

tres años

2012-01-31T06:43:00.001-06:00

happy third birthday to figment soup!!

it all started with pancakes in 2009...

...along with some fantabulous inspiration from the always lovely and ridiculously talented kelly from lala photography.

and here we are...

changed? yes.

resilient? always.

better? for sure.

stronger? totally.

happier than ever? you betcha!!

cheers!

without this blog and my amazingly wonderful friends (and family), i am not sure i'd be the same beaming person i am today.

for that, i am whole-heartedly, head to toe, inside-outside-upside down, and forever grateful.

big smiles and a round of something positively delightful for everyone - on me (but no shots, please). :)

cheers...

...and peace!!!

my forehead is happy

2012-01-26T19:25:00.003-06:00

i'm a screen junkie and between work, grad school, facebook, the blog, and email, i spend a decent amount of time on the computer in the evenings.

last night, a friend of mine posted about a product she loves. it is software that adjusts the lighting of your computer screen to the lighting your body needs to maintain its innate awareness of day and night.

i downloaded it, and aside from my new iphone, walter, and my children (not necessarily in that order), i'm not sure i've ever fallen in love with something so quickly.

i know i've written about the furrow in my brow before...well, i've never actually felt it relax. until last night. i'm not kidding you - when the software kicked in, i honestly felt the muscles in my forehead decompress and they weren't really sure what to do with themselves.

it's better than chocolate. which is weird.

and true.

please take my word for it and give it a shot. i was kind of looking forward to it getting dark(ish) tonight simply so i could see if my brow would unfurrow again. it worked.

just try it.

click here now, thank me later.

oh yeah - it's free.

if i used my labels the way they're meant to be used, i would categorize this under 'fountain of youth.'

peace...

disclaimer: i read a couple of the reviews and it doesn't look like it's ideal for iphones...

iWish

2012-01-24T18:42:00.004-06:00

iWish iWas cool enough to use my brand new iPhone. iHave been wanting one for a very long time, but when iGot divorced, iSigned a three-year contract on a network that didn't have iPhones. today iTook the iPlunge (actually iTook it yesterday and my friendly ups delivery man left it on my porch for me at 2:29 this afternoon)!

let me tell you...normally iAm the type of person who cannot wait to open new packages or exciting looking mail. iAm simple like that. iHad a strong start in digging into the plain, brown box...but seeing my tiny new iPhone box made me stop suddenly.

iRealized several things were holding me back from opening the cute, petite, silver lettered box (that yes, iKnow, almost everyone in america has).

what if i'm not cool enough to use it?

what if i break it?

what if it doesn't work?

what if i'm not cool enough to use it?

what if i love it?

what if i...don't love it?

what if i'm not cool enough to use it?

what kind of cover should i get for it

(once iCommit to removing the protective plastic shield)?

what does that cover say about me?

what if i'm not cool enough to use it?

after 30 minutes of staring at the cute little box, iOpened it...and so far, things are looking good. iDid transfer my number from the fruitless network to my new fruitful network, and right now the biggest obstacle iNeed to overcome is deciding whether iShould search for my home phone (because iOnly have it for my alarm system) or go to a neighbor's house (none of whom iActually know) to make it work tonight.

the alternative is waiting until tomorrow and doing it from school. this is what iGet for being less than a social butterfly with my neighbors.

iAm kind of already a little bit in love with it, and iTook an additional moment of silence for steve jobs because let's be honest...genius. right?

at any rate, today iScratched something off my life list. at this rate, iShould be done with it in about nine years and three months which should be somewhere around april 24, 2021. again, this is contingent on the hope that the mayans were smoking crack.

old dog/new tricks

iShall keep you posted on my progress with this new little device. and iMust tell you...kinda loving these.

peace...

shades of boring

2012-01-22T18:56:00.005-06:00

i'm an essie girl. i have been every since i moved to austin. i've had three favorite shades lately, and have comfortably rotated amongst them as my fancy floated along the road of life.

when i started thinking about it, my life revolves around varying shades neutrals. i'm not a bright color kind of person, but instead i'm naturally drawn to grays and blacks and browns and beiges. when i started examining my polish collection, i realized that it stuck to my plain vanilla taste.

i feel very flashy when i wear buy me a cameo, but as it turns out, it is simply a frosted satin mocha. translation: brownish beige with a smidge of frost.

i wear eternal optimist when i'm feeling more susie sunshine than usual. however, on closer examination, this color is really just a boring pale pink (spiced tea rose with a dash of cream).

if i'm feeling really edgy, i slap on a coat of mink muffs. it even sounds edgy - don't you think? although its darkness is kind of wild for me, in reality it's nothing more than a smoky plush taupe.

today i set out on a new adventure. i promised myself that i was going to purchase something outlandish and extravagant and i was going to do it in the form of a new shade of offensively loud nail polish. i was just in one of those moods.

don't worry, it didn't last long, and it's been over for about four hours. but i did think my purchase qualified as an overwhelming success.

today i bought a new essie shade called it's genius. it looks kind of sassy in the bottle. it's practically purple, which is the complete opposite of boring or beige. and it even has glitter in it. so in the moment of fulfilling my shopping prophecy for the day, i felt that i'd chalked up a major success.

when i got home, i put it on and realized that it probably falls in the same (ish) plain vanilla category as my other faves. guess what.

i was right.

it's genius starts out strong..."a violet quartz shimmer..." but upon further reading, i realized that i have once again pigeon holed myself smack dab in the middle of boringsville. "...with beige undertones."

oh well, i tried.

i'm not going to analyze it further because...an all new part one of two show is coming on relatively soon, but i promised you we'd never speak of it again. so we won't.

but it rhymes with schmarclashians.

and regardless of my plain jane inclinations, essie continues to make me a super happy camper (just like the schmarclashians).

peace and polish (with a short o, not a long one)...

i love our weekends

2012-01-21T22:46:00.004-06:00

basketball seasons has officially started for the girls, and they both played so well today! i love seeing how much they improve each year. a friend of mine has a daughter who is cee's age and a son who is jay's age. they've been on the same basketball and soccer teams for three years, and it's fun to watch those friendships grow, too.

something was weird with my camera, but here are a few shots.

cee is the one in green, and this was right after an awesome steal!

a parent asked me after the game where she learned to shoot. he didn't take me seriously when i said, 'i taught her everything she knows.' :)

jay did a great job, too, but her specialty seems to be entertaining and making sure everyone on the sidelines is taken care of. :) i tried, but i never got a good picture of her on defense. she has the most awesome jazz hands move that i am determined to capture before the season ends!

the girls attend an afterschool program through the ymca, and lots of their counselors from there also call their games. needless to say, we've gotten to know some of them pretty well, and they have been really good role models for the girls to have in their lives.

during cee's game, jay was going to the ladies room and she couldn't leave the gym because the doors were being blocked. she peeked out the window to see why and ended up seeing one of their favorite counselors on a stretcher. it really did scare her. we found out later that he had a seizure, and that's not something that's easy to explain to kids.

in an effort to take their minds off of it, we went shopping, to dinner and a movie. it didn't work, but they did find some way cute stuff...and chipwrecked had about three really funny lines in it.

grad school started this week, and i feel like we are finally back into our daily routine. that's a pretty good feeling!

i have sneezed about 258 times in the last three hours, so i'm going to take some medicine and hit the hay.

oh - one last thing i want to leave you with...because i feel like i didn't do equal justice for jay today...they watched some of 'never say never' tonight (justin bieber) and she took notes. in her new justin bieber composition notebook. yup - she's definitely my kid!

peace...

birds of a feather

2012-01-16T10:18:00.004-06:00

the girls and i just finished inventing a flock of friends. i got the idea from a facebook friend who did something similar with her sister - except they were at a studio, not at their house. i was intrigued because my friend's turned out really pretty, and her sister's was a little cracked out.

i figured it would be a fun project to see how differently our own feathered friends would turn out...take a peek...

and here's our finished flock!!

cee made zaydae (pronounced 'zeta' as in epsilon zeta eta theta iota kappa lamda mu nu)...

jay made camille (which reminds me of bill cosby's wife)...

and mine is named zoey (without the two dots over the 'o' because i don't understand the purpose of the dots)...

our mess was massive, but it's all cleaned up now and we just need to find the perfect place to hang our new feathered friends.

woo hoo! and now we're off to conquer the day.

peace...

'peace is not merely a distant goal that we seek, but a means by which we arrive at that goal.' ~mlk, jr.

confessions

2012-01-15T20:58:00.008-06:00

this entire post revolves around reality tv. i apologize for that in advance, i hope you don't judge me, and i think in the end you'll see we can blame almost all of this on 'the donald.'

1. i have managed not to watch e! for at least three years...until two weeks ago. i never considered not watching e! as an accomplishment of any type...until two weeks ago.

2. when giuliana depandi {hyphen} rancic was diagnosed with breast cancer, i was genuinely sad. i sort of feel like i know her since i've watched her show on bravo, and my heart immediately went out to her. i used to watch her on e! news all the time...before i unexpectedly gave it up. during the holidays, i saw her on the today show talking about her surgery and i suddenly felt compelled to see if she was back on e! and if she could raise her arms above shoulder height yet (this is something i take for granted).

3. i watched along with the other struggles she and her hubby have gone through (and documented) on the show giuliana and bill. an illegit marriage...trying to have a baby...losing a baby...moving to la from chicago...deciding where to open a restaurant...jet setting to and fro...you get the idea.

4. the main reason i watched giuliana and bill is because bill was my favorite on the first season of the apprentice. so cute and handsome and dreamy. and golf coursy. and intelligent and ambitious...which is why i started watching giuliana and bill in the first place. which is why we can ultimately blame all of this on trump (and his hair). right?

5. which leads me to the last two weeks. in my concerned efforts to make sure giuliana is recovering okay from her surgery, i have inadvertently been inundated with the kardashians. before the inundation, i vaguely knew who they were. i knew bruce jenner was somehow involved. i knew they were armenian. but now i really, really know them. keeping up with the kardashians has kind of taken over my spare tv time. kourtney. kim. khloe. kris. hump. scott. mason. now i know them all.

6. an all new episode is coming on tonight, and i can hardly wait!!!!

it might be time for an intervention...or for me to not have cable anymore. but if i didn't have cable, i wouldn't be able to watch the bachelor or the real housewives of orange county (not atlanta, not beverly hills, not anywhere else...just orange county).

do i have a problem?

probably.

am i concerned?

minimally.

do i need to go?

yes...because the all new episode is starting...in two minutes!!!

if you promise to not let this confession define me, i promise to never, ever write about it again. deal?

peace...

voila

2012-01-13T19:23:00.005-06:00

remember i told you about the hill with the view? well, three things have happened since then.

1) i decided it isn't actually a hill;

2) i took pictures for you (without causing any embarassment to myself or my children); and

3) i realized that i still love the breathtaking view, hill or not.

here's what i see almost every single day on my way to work. it's never exactly the same, and today the clouds weren't as wispy as usual. still - to me, this is completely fabulous. oh, and it all happened between 7:22 and 7:26 this morning.

friday the 13th?

friday the schmirnteenth.

how can anything go wrong with a day that starts with so much solitude and grace?

this is what i would consider the zenith of my hill, and that's why i decided it isn't a hill afterall.

but how can you deny this view your everlasting gratitude?

an old friend taught me that when you have views like this, you just have to give god a high five, knucks, a booty bump...or if those are all too informal for your taste, you can simply say, 'way to go, god.'

if you're really fancy, you might opt for a refined, 'amen.'

either way, win-win.

good stuff.

peace...

the hill with a view

2012-01-10T11:02:00.005-06:00

i have been meaning to tell you about a hill with a view for quite awhile.

it recently reigstered with me (after eight years in the same town) that even though i live near the hill country, the terrain here is relatively flat, which adds significance to this hill. it isn't a spectacular hill, and i really never noticed it until sometime in october. it isn't a new hill - it's been there for years (by default, i'm feeling pretty confident about this point).

now that i'm thinking about it, calling it a hill might even be a bit of an exaggeration.

each morning when i leave my house, it's still basically dark outside. the school the girls attend is about three miles from our house, and on the way there, we go up the 'hill'. then i drop them off, and right after i leave their school to head towards mine, i usually have my breath taken away.

when i'm at the top of the 'hill', the sun is just about to poke its head over the edge of the land...or it has just broken over the horizon and gives me a beautiful first glance at its rays for the day. either way, my view from this 'hill' is priceless. the sky turns from a gloomy gray into the most incredible palette of turquoises, oranges, pinks, and purples.

you'd think after awhile it would become routine, just another part of the scenery, and hardly noticed, but that isn't the case. each day offers a completely unique view. each day offers something pretty incredible. it makes me feel lucky to get to start most of my days with a view like that.

i know i could really bolster my post right now by including some amazing pictures for you. it never fails, though, that even if i have my camera with me, i feel like i don't have the time to stop and capture it. in the next few weeks i'm going to take the time to slow down and catch a couple of shots of the spectacle. i'll try not to be the weird person standing on the side of the road, but i won't make any promises.

i'm home with a sick thing two today. as usual, this isn't traditionally her healthiest time of the year. from the beginning of december through the end of february, fever is our biggest nemisis. thankfully she isn't feeling too bad and she has a big smile on her face.

this morning she got to catch the view from my 'hill' with me after we dropped cee of at school. i was tempted to go home and get my camera and drive back to catch a shot or two...but i felt like that wouldn't be as organic as the real deal.

plus jay was ready to get back home and snuggle up on the couch with walter and browning. she told me that today we are going to play some, drink some, sleep some...and then we can play some more, eat some, and sleep some more. this sounds like how my saturdays used to be before i had kids, and i like her idea a lot!

i hope she's feeling better soon, and i have to go now because i've just been informed that it's time for our first sleep. :)

happy tuesday. peace...

friends & cookies...

2012-01-08T17:15:00.006-06:00

what a great weekend!! some of my favorite people were back in town under very unique circumstances. one of these people is getting married in about three months, and i will be a part of the festivities...i'm totally looking forward to it! the girls and i had dinner and a sleepover with them, and it was (as always) so wonderful to catch up!

and continuing with the greatness, i have officially found my 'go-to cookie recipe' for my life list! i thought this would be one that came much, much further down the road, but i was totally wrong. it's simple and delicious. there isn't really a great story to go along with this other than 'i found it,' but i guess that happens sometimes...

the finished product looked a little something like this (while it lasted).

let's just say that cee has already had these two and is begging for a third. she's quite possibly the world's pickiest eater, so that's kind of a stand-alone testament to the 'go-to' status of these little goodies!

peace.

radius clause

2012-01-03T22:55:00.006-06:00

the girls got home safely sunday - an hour ahead of schedule! i felt like all the missing pieces of my puzzle were instantly back intact from the minute i scooped them into my arms and covered them in kisses from head to toe!

even though they were only gone for six whole entire equinoxically long days, it felt like much, much more of a span...in a painful, nibble away at my heart kind of way.

have you ever tried parting your hair on a different side for no specific reason only to find that your whole day (and the balance of your head) feels quirky and off and lopsided? that's kind of how i feel when they're gone: quirky, off, and lopsided. and the wind doesn't seem to play fair, either.

while you ponder parting your hair on a different side for a day, i have a confession: i was a freakishly weird mess from the moment they left. it was the first "big" trip they've ever taken without me, and once they drove away, i was suddenly overwhelmed with a very sickening sense of fear and worry.

trips to waco and back? not a problem. trips to the beach and back? no biggie. trips where i can't get to them within about three hours? no can do.

apparently my mind and my heart have a radius clause, and this trip was definitely in violation of my comfort zone.

it was all-consuming and it ended once i knew they had arrived safely. it started back up the very moment i knew they were making the drive back home, and subsided (duh) once they were back in my arms sunday evening.

they were home.

they were safe.

they were sound.

and then last night (or this morning...) at 2:45 am, i woke up with the same feeling of all-consuming fear and worry. i checked on them, tucked their covers around them, kissed them, and knew they were perfectly enveloped in love and safety.

but i couldn't make myself go back to sleep. i tossed and turned and counted sheep and tried to decipher the root of my worries. i tried to trick my mind into oblivion. i tried rationalizing the feeling. i even tried to blame it on bad food. nothing worked to calm my jitters last night...probably because i couldn't quite pinpoint exactly what it is that has me unnerved.

i don't think there's a contractual resolution that can soothe my soul right now. this is a completely new feeling for me, and i'm not a fan of it. is this normal? i have no idea.

is this how i'm going to feel every time cee and jay are out with their friends?

will i worry like this when they are old enough to drive?

and how in the world am i supposed to deal with this feeling once they're in college on their own?

if this is my destined path in parenthood, i am going to be completely gray before they're out of elementary school (and just last week, i had a professional confirmation of 'still no grays!').

there are some aspects of parenthood you can't prepare for. this whole business of letting my girls take baby steps into the wild blue yonder? i'm not sure this is something i'm capable of doing.

the pollyanna/susie sunshine side of me is still trying to unearth the silver lining in all of this (and embellish it with happiness), and in my head i honestly already know what the silver lining and common sense are in this scenario...except it's not as simple as convincing my heart to acknowledge the obvious.

this is a major reality check for me.

if i knew how to put it into concise words, then i would probably add it to my facebook timeline of major life events. but really, there aren't any words that can capture this weird feeling i've discovered.

time for bed.

peace...

out with the old, in with the new

2012-01-01T11:05:00.006-06:00

in nine hours, my sweet girls should be back home in my arms. it's been hard having them gone for so long and i can't wait to love on them! they've had a great time...i know the snow and mountainy air make their hearts happy.

2011 was an interesting one for sure, and i continue to feel very lucky and completely blessed.

on the flip side, it wasn't a great year for everybody. i know plenty of people who are ready to kick last year to the curb. homes burned (literally & figuratively). a coworker lost her son. a friend i grew up with lost her two brothers - eight months apart. one friend fought breast cancer, and another is fighting uterine cancer.

watching people stand up to face adversity and overcome broken hearts or illness really says something great about the human spirit and the strength we have. so many times it seems like we don't realize how strong we are until we face a challenge. for me, it also puts my own problems and worries in perfect perspective.

here are two of my favorite quotes. i found them and loved them separately, and then i realized that they really are a great pairing. now, they're framed on my dresser.

'we must accept finite disappointment, but we must never lose infinite hope.' - mlk, jr.

'hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come. you wait and watch and work: you don't give up.' -anne lamott

i read these every day, and for whatever reason, they inspire me. i try to instill some of this into the girls as they learn to navigate their way through the world. sometimes i have to stop and remind myself of these when i forget how to navigate the world.

i hope that 2012 is a better year for those who need it to be, and i hope that 2012 is a blessed year for us all. here's how jay welcomed the new year into her life...

i completely love her enthusiasm (and her inside out shirt)! happy new year, and more importantly, cheers! oh, and don't forget to eat some black eyed peas...

intentionally early

2011-12-29T11:42:00.010-06:00

i suck at new years resolutions. one of my friends posted an interesting status tuesday - 'Just a friendly reminder... You have 4 more days to do what you're going to go back to doing after you get tired of keeping your New Year's resolutions.'

that's so me. i start with great inspiration and tons of gusto, but then i feel ridiculously guilty when i fail or forget or something happens that distracts me. once the initial celebratory bubbles fizzle away, my good intentions tend to follow suit.

with that in mind, i've decided to try something new: a life list. i actually wrote this list last week and published it as a new page, but i wanted to have some time to let it marinade and make sure i was good to go with everything i've included on it. i made a few changes, substitutions, additions, and deletions, and i think it's officially done now.

some people do these life lists with sponsorships in mind, but mine is much more simplified. my plan is to mark things off of the list as i accomplish them, and maybe some great stories will come out of the process. we shall see.

so without further ado, the list is ready!

happy thursday (aka the beginning of the rest of your life!)...

the lull

2011-12-27T10:32:00.005-06:00

the time between christmas and new years is always a lull for me, and i love some good down time. for me, it's a time to collect my thoughts, center myself, and catch up on things that need catching up on...like reading.

the girls left for a ski trip with their dad last night. cee is determined to learn to board, while jay is dead set on making as many snow angels as possible. i managed to coerce them into a few photos before they headed out of town.

i loved the sun and the way the rays splashed and played into the ones by the windows. i wish i knew how to do bokeh. maybe i should learn...but not today.

i have a fabulous stack of books i'm about to dive into. that's actually not true because they're all on my nook...so i guess i'm about to dive into several megabytes of greatness. see ya on the flip side!

peace...

walter is...

2011-12-27T09:08:00.020-06:00

last week, i made a bit of a premature call on who walter's voice-over would be if he could talk. naturally, it's an important decision every dog owner should consider when getting to know their new four-legged friend.
i'm too embarassed to tell you who i went with the first time, but i'm happy to let you know that walter now has a voice. i'm pretty proud of it, too.

stoltz picture courtesy of imdb

what do you think? can you see the resemblance? the coloring? the intense eyes?

walter is...eric stoltz.

not the pulp fiction eric stoltz, but the some kind of wonderful eric stoltz...where no matter how badly he thought he was in love with amanda jones, we all really hoped he'd pick watts. because she played the drums, was a little rebellious, said cool things like 'you break his heart, i break your face,' and most obviously because she really loved him.

i feel so much better. i knew the first choice was wrong, and you can't go through life with a bad voice-over for your dog. it's just not right.

and...scene.

small town christmas

2011-12-24T14:12:00.005-06:00

i grew up in a very small, west texas town. it was in the middle of nowhere, and it was positively filled with rockwellian magic. at the time, i didn't realize how many great things happened there, but looking back, it was full of wonderful people and it overflowed with charm, tumble weeds, and breathtaking sunsets.

the gas station i used was full service, and we had 'an account'. we also had 'accounts' at a ladies boutique, the pharmacy, and the hardware store. there were two grocery stores: the big one and the little one. if you needed regular items, the little one would do, but if you needed something fancy - like wheat bread or deli meat - the big one worked better.

the town was 'dry,' and my parents would drive 30 minutes to restock their supplies...they didn't know about the bootlegger, one-legged mary, who roamed across the tracks on friday and saturday nights. football and basketball were huge. for entertainment, we drove the 'drag'...from sonic to allsups and back. over and over and over again.

the land was flat, our hair was big, the streets weren't tree-lined, and the smell of burning cotton seed soaked the air from october through january of each year. no matter where you went, you'd bump into someone you knew by name. we left our keys in our cars and didn't worry about locking our front doors. trust was a basic pillar of that community.

each christmas, the chamber of commerce sponsored a tour of homes. i have no idea how they picked which homes would be featured, but it was one of my most favorite things to do each year. if your home was selected for the tour, you basically decked your halls to the nines, popped some delicious baked goods in the oven, prepared a festive punch, turned on the christmas music, and opened your doors to the entire community.

the tour lasted each night for an entire week. children were dressed in their holiday best each night - and somehow managed impeccible holiday behavior each night. lights twinkled from each window of the homes, and it really was a magical week in our tiny little town.

i was thinking about the impossible logistics of it all last night...how much effort went into the presentation, keeping your home spotless for a week (restrooms & kitchen, too), keeping freshly baked goodies plentiful, keeping your children presentable, going to bed exhausted each night, and waking up to do it all over again the next day. with a smile on your face.

that was part of the magic that i never understood as a kid, but the ladies who lived in those homes did it out of the kindness of their hearts for the better of the community.

i'm not sure it's something that could happen anymore...willingly welcoming strangers to parade in and out of your home...opening your door to people you don't know...expecting so much from our kids...doing so much with nothing expected in return. times have changed. now, liability indemnifications would need to be executed and underwritten before anything so carefree might happen. society has changed.

although i'm sad my girls don't get to experience that same brand of small town charm, there are still plenty of other types to go around and keep us smiling. whatever the magic is that exists in small towns, i think someone should find a way to put it in jar, sprinkle some glitter on it, fill it with water, seal the lid, and shake up the old memories from time to time...because sometimes you forget how quaint and fabulous things were.

my mom got here yesterday, and we are officially in christmas eve mode. there are cookies to bake for santa, treats to make for the reindeer, farewell letters to write for jerry, and plenty of good cheer to be shared (ahem...wine).

whether it's the small town type, the big city kind, or something in between, i hope you and your family have a wonderful holiday.

i'll leave you with my most favorite christmas decoration ever:

cheers!! and peace...

when i grow up...

2011-12-22T13:53:00.006-06:00

the girls were having one of those deep, serious sister conversations in the car today about santa claus. i may or may not have been eavesdropping as they continued to talk about how they want to do the same thing even when they grow up because 'sisters should always stick together no matter what.'

and then we passed a fedex truck.

jay says, 'when i grow up, i want to be a fedex delivery person so i can go to the north pole and meet santa and mrs. claus and the elves and maybe i can pet the reindeer and meet jerry's family while i'm there. cee, is that something we could do together?'

cee says, 'sure....'

i'm not convinced by her reply, so i inquire further.

i ask, 'so you want to be a fedex delivery person, too?'

cee answers, 'no, mom. i want to own the company and jay can be my best employee and i can give her bonuses. that way i'm the billionaire and we're still sticking together.'

global thinker? check.

entrepreneurial spirit? check.

competitive drive? and check.

their conversation reminded me of an idea i've been kicking around for awhile, and it prompted me to start a new blog page. you can link to it here, and it's also embedded in the right margin...i'm hoping it will be a good alternative for people who suck at new years resolutions (like me).

i'll post about it, too, but not right now.

you know how things eat away at you and make you lose sleep and you toss and turn the scenario around in your head (ad nauseum) and you're still stumped by what happened? yeah, that's happened to me for the last couple of nights.

therefore, i'm pretty tired....which is why i now declare it nap time.

peace...

back to good

2011-12-21T00:23:00.002-06:00

today was filled with friends. that's always guaranteed to bring a smile to anybody's face and make you back yourself out from the doldrums of my previous post.

the girls and i had lunch with one of my favorites from college and her two adorable boys. there's something magically wonderful about watching your kids play with the kids of someone who is truly a part of your fabric...my soul was instantly recharged after our visit!

this afternoon kept the greatness coming. the u.p.s. man made a late afternoon drop off and i figured it was a last minute gift i'd ordered for the girls. i'm not the most patient person, so i opened it in my room and laughed so hard that cee and jay came running in to see what the fuss was all about.

i wanted to show you in pictures...i really, really did.

it's just that walter isn't quite used to my camera yet. the first three hundred and forty one pictures looked something like this...

here's one of the endearing things about walter...life is kind of like groundhog day in his mind. every time he looks at me, it's like he's seeing me all over again for the first time and he gets so excited that he bolts straight for me. it cracks me up...in the mornings, even though he's slept right next to me all night, he sees my face and his world lights up. super sweet and very flattering...but not ideal for taking pictures of him.

finally, after ten minutes of ~~torturing~~ training him, i got my shot of the gift that made us giddy:

oh, my friend rachel is so very funny! she gave me the heads up to expect something from amazon, but i did not expect it to be this bit of literary fabulousness!

a match made in heaven. you can get your own set (book + plush) online.

tonight i went to dinner and had the chance to catch up with another dear friend. on my way to dinner, i followed my heart and made an executive decision about walter. he was scheduled to be neutered tomorrow morning.

after our initial visit, jay got a little sad about the snipping process. we have been referring to 'them' as his 'fa la la la las' and jay said it just didn't seem right to take away his fa la la la las while it's still christmas time, so i cancelled the appointment for tomorrow.

and that's probably more information than you ever wanted to know about my dog's anatomy or the books my girls read. either way, his reprieve has to be as good a good gift for the little guy as our new book was for us today.

we’ll probably have a much better christmas since none of us will be donning elizabethan collars.

that’s gotta count for something.

good night....peace.

silent nights

2011-12-18T10:37:00.003-06:00

as a single mom, silent nights seem to be my nemesis during the holidays. while i am absolutely a girl who loves time alone, that isn't always the case during the holidays.

yesterday afternoon, the girls went to waco for christmas with their grandparents. after they left, i conquered the last of my christmas list, wrapped what needed to be wrapped, cleaned house, cooked dinner, caught up on my blogs (welcome back, jftb), and rearranged my office into a guest bedroom. it's pretty cute, too.

by the time the sun was setting, all of my to-dos were done. and last night i realized that i do an excellent job of keeping myself busy to help the time pass.

since i am done with grad school for a month, i found myself left to my own devices. i'm a sucker for a good romantic comedy, and so many of my favorites include christmas. the holiday (obviously), you've got mail, love actually, while you were sleeping...and those really aren't fun to watch when you're all alone and feeling sorry for yourself. which i was.

then i did what any reasonable girl would do: i opened a bottle of wine and forced myself into a non-romantic comedy that had absolutely nothing to do with christmas: the hangover. and after that, everything was better (which is, honestly, a slightly sugar-coated version of the truth). but everything will be better and i will be fine (and that's the truth).

so that's that...sometimes silent nights really do suck.

speaking of sugar-coated, the girls and i are going to make some cookies this afternoon. little slices of cranberry and orange flavored heaven.

oh, and with the addition of walter to our family, i updated our cast of characters. he's adjusting to our home swimmingly; however, he does like to pop his little snout into my drinks. so far we know he likes diet cokes and wine (which isn't great news). our next efforts will be spent learning about table manners, meningitis, and cooties.

and finally, i leave you with this...

as you can see, browning loves his new little buddy. :)

peace and sugar-coated sugar plum fairies...

walter

2011-12-16T21:38:00.001-06:00

today-slash-last night i decided a surprise was in store for the girls. i set up an elaborate plan to unveil the fluffy glory and here's what happened next...

and then there were tears. from both of them. and i wasn't exactly sure what to do with those tears because for the last nine years, i've been used to seeing them cry when they're sad or hurt or upset. and i thought my brilliant plan had taken a turn for the worse.

instead, they fervently explained to me how excited and happy they were about whatever it was that came with these gifts. and it took us all a moment to get past the flood of happy tears.

i think it's pretty safe to say our new addition is a hit.

wish us luck with walter (and while you're at it, you might send a little luck browning's way, too).

peace and puppies...

broken

2011-12-14T21:04:00.002-06:00

my mom always told me, 'if you love someone, set them free. if they come back, they're yours forever.' i'm like the bird that gets set free. i'd have to say i'm like a canary. i think that's why my mom always sets me free, and now it's time for me to come back to her. i feel like one of these days she'll want to keep me.

this was a part of my conversation with a girl who i promised myself i'd watch over at beginning of this school year. she's twelve, and she's been through more in her life than i can possibly imagine.

monday was the ultimate of mondays for her, and for me, too (not that this is really about me at all). some of the things she shared with me are still whirling around my head, and i still haven't forced myself to take the time to sit down and sort through them because i'm scared that i won't be able to organize any of it very well.

she has endured more in twelve years than most people will endure in a lifetime.

and it's supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year right now.

in the last three days, that claim has suddenly become very situationally relative to me: the holidays aren't happy for everyone.

my least favorite part of teaching is seeing kids - children - who have been damaged by adults. unfortunately, the holidays unveil the darker sides in lots of people, and as a teacher i see that kids are ultimately the ones who suffer the most.

if the saying is true...life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath today...then i think i've had my share of breath-taking moments for the week.

and it's only wednesday.

count your blessings and hug your loved ones...

true story.

not as talented as sarah

2011-12-10T09:24:00.000-06:00

sweet jay loves to write. without further ado, i present to you the. greatest. story. ever. written.

jerry has been showing some incredible skill in the last few days, too.

the other day, he took extra care to give us all a good laugh...

he's pretty talented, too.

but obviously not as talented as sarah (duh).

peace.

if somebody asked me...

2011-12-05T20:28:00.007-06:00

...to give today a name (other than monday), then i would, without hesitation, call it 'the time i masqueraded as a human cortisol fountain.'

i haven't been home very long, and i left my house at 4:45 am. that's not normal in my world, and i think that any hour before 5 am should be deemed unholy.

the good news is that all is well, i have on flannel sock monkey pj's, browning is warming my feet (i've literally been too cold for words all day long), i have a full glass of 'don't even ask', and the proposal is on tv.

i knew writing would continue making things better, and then i realized that i wasn't sure where to start. afterall, jerry has been up to quite a bit, and funny things have happened in life, and i think sometimes people who blog feel like they've gotten so far behind that they can't catch up. and then they just stop because they're so far behind.

i don't want that to happen, so this may possibly be the crappiest, most disjointed post ever, but we'll call this a crappy first draft (thank you anne lamott and bird by bird).

when last i left you, i had a feeling that jerry was about to cause some shennanigans. shockingly, i was right. do you see what i see?

please don't judge her non-matching jammies...

in case you're thinking 'oh my gosh, that's brilliant. i'm going to steal it,' i have a word of caution for you. jay is extremely sensitive and jerry didn't factor that into his plans. jay's emotions friday night ranged from hysterical to amused to 'curious' each time she came in and the fan was on...

but by the end of the night, she was giving jerry joy rides.

(and wishing she could duct tape herself to the ceiling fan)

and you'll be happy to know that jerry finally peeled himself away from the fan...

but he left a little something for the girls (with a side order of glitter for me).

and i was pretty sure he was the most brilliant elf i'd ever met...until they started hitting each other and yelling at each other 5 minutes later.

and then i'm not really sure where he ended up sunday or even today because we had birthday parties and balloon launches and sleepovers and...

...and then in the wee hours of what would eventually become 'today', my mom and i got up at 4:15 so we could leave my house at 4:45 so we could have her to the hospital at 5:30. these hours, in my book, cannot technically be defined as 'morning' or 'evening' because they are so ridiculous and off the charts.

shortly after today's 'ridiculous' hours, my mom had surgery.

i realize that people have surgery every day, and i realize that people become easily stressed when their family members are having surgery.

it's just that i'm not usually one of those people because i tend to do a pretty good job of managing stress.

usually.

but not today (enter the cortisol party fountain extravaganza).

it wasn't until she was laying on the stretcher/rolly bed thing that i realized why it completely unnerves me to see her like that.

it's because she's one of the strongest people i've ever known. and to see her in such a weak and vulnerable state just doesn't sit well with me.

not at all.

she had surgery in august to unblock her femoral artery, and she did a great job. but a couple of weeks ago, her body rejected the stents that were put in her leg, and her artery was almost completely blocked again.

luckily for lots of people, she has a completely amazing and gifted surgeon, and he fixed her up again today. to me, it seems like the words 'thank you' aren't even faintly the beginning of enough to tell a person who does such incredible work on someone who means so much to you.

you know?

one of her best friends came to the hospital to stay with her for the night and sent me home to rest. 'thank you' didn't seem like faintly the beginning of enough for her, either.

the good news is that all is well, my flannel sock monkey pj's totally rock, browning is warming my feet (i'm still defrosting), i have another full glass of 'don't even ask', and the proposal is still on tv.

and tomorrow is a new day.

i hope this wasn't the crappiest post i've ever written, but if it was, then i promise to do better next time. okay?

peace...

december? really? (hi)

2011-12-01T20:31:00.003-06:00

i always welcome december with wide open arms...but it seems like december made a super expeditious arrival this year.

no complaints...nothing more than a casual observation.

i'd just like to point out a few very important things to you.

1. sue sylvester is in the fugitive. did you know that? i didn't...until just now (because i'm watching it). she's a pathologist.

(okay, in all fairness, i probably already knew this, but i just realized it. again.)

2. jerry is quite simply up to no good. 'mom, can we bake a cake?' of course...except for the elf is in the mixer. 'mom, will you teach us to play the piano?' absolutely - except i think we'd be getting into his bubble.

3. i can't be sure, and i would hate to wrongly accuse anyone, but i believe that jerry is also trying to sabatoge my favorite pasttime (aka 'wine fund.'). there's nothing accidental about the location of his dangerous little elf feet.

and why won't he look at the camera for pete's sake??!! he's always glancing innocently off to his right. what's over there?

give me pensive.

is that asking for too much?

give!

me!!

pensive, you little elf!!!

i have a feeling that jerry is simply up to no good tonight.

trouble (it would be with a capital t if i believed in capital letters).

plain and simple.

elves these days...

he makes cee and jay a couple of happy campers, though...

so i guess he has earned a little flexibility in our house...

for now.

peace...

sigh

2011-11-28T17:26:00.004-06:00

as it turns out, the letter h only sustained a superficial wound. it looks like h has made a full recovery with only minor scarring. wish away, friends...

and on a side note, when i downloaded this picture, someone (who shall remain nameless) got totally red-handed busted. compliments of previous dropping deaths, my camera is seriously and strictly off limits (because if it breaks, angels cry). apparently we need to review this rule.

immediately. :)

and on a side note, isn't that the most beautifully painted pink room you've ever seen?

and on a separate side note, i feel like i may have created a bit too much rivalry in my attempt to challenge the girls to be 'the first one to find jerry' each morning. oooops.

peace...

decked

2011-11-26T16:48:00.003-06:00

the tree is up, my halls are decked, and i'm a pretty happy camper right now. i feel like i should have made a to-do list during this break so that i could step back and admire everything i would have been able to check off of it.

in the last week, i have accomplished the following: celebrated cee's birthday, breezed through 'the hunger games', painted both girls' bedrooms (i was finally able to emerge from an abyss of pink yesterday afternoon), devoured 'catching fire', cooked the entire thanksgiving dinner, cried my way through 'mockingjay', put away all my fall decorations, completed two assignments for grad school, welcomed christmas to our home, and ate pancakes (twice).

whew!

i have a fabulous dilemma to deal with. my stocking hangers spell 'wish' which seemed fun and whimsical three years ago, but now i don't really get it. wish what? and why?

when i pulled them out today, i realized the 'h' broke while stuffed in storage and i've tried super gluing it, but it's not looking good. right now my mantle looks like this:

my first thought was that maybe nobody would notice...but i would know. i realized that surely i could find a lonely 'h' somewhere. but then i remembered that 'wish' is kind of random and i could use a change.

next, i thought i could probably find a 'peace' set which would give me options. i could have 'peace' or 'wisp' or 'wise' or 'wasp' or 'spew'. finally, the best idea of all came to me. i realized that i could probably do even better...with the more logical purchase of 'noel' (fyi this picture is not my mantle).

click here to steal my awesome idea

combining 'wis' and 'noel' would give me so many options: wine. wines. wino. winos. lows. lowes. slow. swine.

i'm so excited!

jerry's back and up to his usual antics (i think he loves the kennedys as much as i do), and the girls have been texting me for pictures of him each day (they get back tomorrow).

so all in all, i'd have to say it's shaping up to be a pretty spectacular holiday season. i've already watched elf, miracle on 34th street, christmas vacation, the holiday, and you've got mail. christmas music plays nonstop on 99.5, and my christmas cards came in today.

yes i am a dork...but i seriously love christmas!!! happy saturday everybody!

thankful thoughts

2011-11-24T11:35:00.005-06:00

hands down, this is the beginning of the most wonderful time of the year. i always feel like buddy the elf when i make fluffy, dreamy proclamations like that (erring on the side of annoyingly optimistic), but it's really how i feel.

time to count our blessings. extra time to spend with family and loved ones. time for lots of my favorite movies. time for jerry to make his much-anticipated return. time for christmas cards, cheesy christmas commercials, and christmas music. time to breathe and remember what "it" is really all about.

i started reading 'the hunger games' friday. i finished it sunday evening, and i started the second book in the series, 'catching fire' tuesday and finished it last night. i can't wait to dive into 'mockingjay'.

reading 'the hunger games' has made me realize that i really have a lot to be thankful for and that i take a lot of things for granted. sometimes a minor shift in thought can unearth a new perspective on life for me, and this series has done exactly that. timing is everything, right?

the series definitely reminded me to slow down and appreciate all of my blessings.

i hope you and your families have an incredible day, stuff yourselves absolutely silly, force yourselves into a turkey-induced coma, rinse and repeat...and take time to count your blessings.

in the meantime, wish me luck with today's main course. the cornish game hens are nestled (in a coat of butter and pancetta) all snug in their beds...while visions of roasting juices dance in their heads. i've never done them this way before, but whenever a recipe calls for pancetta and butter stirred together and coated on a tiny bird, i feel inclined to simply say amen.

it seems like the right thing to do.

peace!

p.s. - 2:57 pm update...they were delicious!

nine.

2011-11-21T09:59:00.004-06:00

nine years ago today, my life was changed forever...

that was the day i became a mom. i will never forget the amazing feeling of holding cee for the first time and thinking that i might not ever let her go. for the next eight weeks of her life, i kind of didn't.

it was cold that year (much colder than this year), and i held her warm little body in my arms as much as i possibly could. she was like a little heater who smiled at me and needed me, and i needed her, too. her eyes were as deep and mysterious then as they are now.

she has blossomed into something i could have never imagined. she has qualities that i always hoped she'd acquire and qualities i never dreamed she'd gain. she is simply incredible to me.

her smile can light up an entire room, and she's gotten really good at using that to her advantage. :)

i love watching her wheels spin and churn as she figures out the ways of the world. i love watching her think of stories. i love how she loves school and soccer so much and i love how she loves family even more than school and soccer. and i love how she's picked up on some of my more desirable bad habits instead of the less desirable ones.

and no matter how much i have thoroughly loved every single moment of watching her bloom, this birthday is a little bittersweet for me. for all practical purposes, i've already used up half of my time raising her under my roof. i am pretty sure the next half will go by much quicker than the first, and that thought leaves me with a huge lump in my throat.

i hope i make the most of every moment of the next nine years of her life. there really isn't a minute i want to miss, and i feel like i'm suddenly running a race against time.

she's been keeping a detailed list of all the things i've told her she can start doing...when she's nine. i don't remember all of these, but she's done a great job of marking my words. this year will, apparently, be filled with ironing, cell phones, itouches, and redecorating her room. time for me to pay up on those promises!

this morning, she crawled into my lap, looked at me with those big brown eyes, gave me that winning smile, and wrapped her long arms around my neck to remind me how much she still needs me. and i need her more than ever.

happy birthday to the most incredible nine year old i've ever met!!!

peace...

and check!

2011-11-19T15:35:00.004-06:00

another year of christmas pictures are over and done! the girls did a fabulous job, the cards are ordered, and i even managed a 25% discount. score!

this picture was my favorite...

and this picture was their favorite...

and then the three of us agreed on an entirely different picture to use for our card.

when i was fixing their hair for one of the shots, i found a mini-colony of glitter stuck to jay's scalp. not only is it everywhere, it follows us.

cee's birthday is on monday, and we've got lots of good stuff to take care of this weekend (and next week). being a teacher rocks during the holidays: no work until nov. 28...woo hoo!

i cannot wait to drag out my christmas fanfare - by this time next week, my halls will be completely decked!

okay, i'm feeling way too exclamation marky right now. gotta get it back together.

in the meantime, if you'd like a good read about perserverance, i double dog dare you to read this. he's my fantasy football namesake. :)

peace and portraits...

fashion faux pas

2011-11-17T19:30:00.007-06:00

there is really no way to adequately describe the feeling you get when you're a single mom and your children stayed with their dad the night before and when you pick them up from school the next day, you realize they are dressed like orphans.

i won't even attempt to define the precise level of my mortification, but let me set the scene for you. it was 42 degrees this morning. it is november, exactly a week before thanksgiving. it is after labor day. easter is at least five months away, and any self-respecting southern girl knows you just can't wear white after labor day or before easter. and boots never, ever go with soccer shorts.

i'm pretty sure emily post has written about this.

so you can imagine my horror when i picked up these cutie pies from school this afternoon.

and the kicker is that i'm no fashionista myself, so i am certain there are other fashion laws that we've undoubtedly violated. can you find them? (hint: jay's pants aren't buttoned)

i know i shouldn't worry about what other people think, but i do. i have to think that somewhere throughout the day, someone saw my children, wondered if i was drunk when i dropped them off at school, and had no idea that i knew nothing about their outfits until the bitter, heartless end.

when i asked her about the clothing selection, cee simply replied, 'i wanted to play soccer and wear cute shoes. and my shoes match my shirt! isn't it the greatest?'

well, it's something...

my punched-in-the-gut feeling was something, too. although i can't pinpoint the 'how', it parallels in magnitude to the day i picked jay up from daycare (under similar single-mom circumstances) and cringed at her 'ho ho ho' santa shirt. it was may. her shirt was red, her pants were purple. yet somehow, today was distinctly and measurably worse.

i love my sweet baby girls to pieces. absolutely love them from head to toe. matching or not, they are my world.

the exciting news is that we are doing our christmas pictures in t-minus 48 hours. and i promise not to post anymore mismatched photos between now and then. deal?

good. :)

peace...

a glittery resignation

2011-11-12T12:57:00.007-06:00

i am waving my white (sparkly) flag. i have resigned myself to accept the fact that my house will be gently dusted in glitter until sometime in the latter part of february.

it all started around halloween when cee painted a pumpkin for a class project and left a trail of glitter where ever she went. it was followed by shirts they both received as gifts that are covered in glitter (we love them, mimi) and paints that are glitter-based.

i can vacuum and sweep on a daily basis and still, at the end of the day, i will find glitter in weird places...on their bedroom floors; in their bathroom sink; on browning's tail; on me; on the piano keys. you get the idea.

it's everywhere!

in a couple of weeks, we'll be dragging out the christmas decorations (i can hardly wait!!!) which will infest our humble abode with yet another layer of glittery awesomeness.

new years naturally lends itself to more glitter, and just when i have all of our holiday decorations tucked away, it's time for valentines.

and that's where i draw the line in my five-month war on glitter. there will be no glitter for st. patricks day. or easter. or the 4th of july. none. do you hear me, glittter fairy? i said none!!

then again, we are a house of three girls (two little, one not)...glitter is part of our daily fabric...it's part of what makes us tick, and it's part of what makes our lives a little more sparkly. without glitter, our home wouldn't be quite the same...and home is what it's all about.

i hope you have a sparkling, glittery, fabulous weekend. :)

peace and pizazz...

a smattering of things

2011-11-10T20:38:00.011-06:00

1. i have been wanting a nook for quite awhile...namely since the metaphorical death of my local borders (moment of silence, please. and thank you.). i'm still working my way through the loss, and tonight things got a little easier.

2. i got a nook! a nook color to be specific...i feel like a technological genius right now and i am truly, madly, and deeply in l-o-v-e with it! isn't it cute?

in addition to its wicked cuteness, it has angry birds on it (which will stifle my iphone urge for at least a few months)! i am a little worried that i'm not going to be smart enough to figure out how everything works, but i'm looking forward to trying.

3. my class started analogies this week. i love analogies. they fuel my nerdy soul. did you know that?

4. much like the chicken and the egg, i'm not sure of the exact order in which the next series of events unfolded. i've had 'the world is your oyster' on my mind a lot lately. i've also noticed that browning drinks out of the toilet more than normal lately. it doesn't matter if i put the lid down or not. he can lift the lid with his nose, and then the toilet becomes his proverbial oyster. see? which came first...

5. i've been rereading my favorite david sedaris goodies since my rollicking night in san antonio last week and i am so excited to get them on my nook. as a result, i feel like i've been laughing more than usual, and my stomach muscles are finally adjusting to it all.

6. something odd happened two and a half weeks ago. i'm sure it happens to a lot of bloggers. even though i like to think the people who read my blog are primarily people i know, i obviously keep myself moderately anonymous because i realize there are people who read my blog who i don't actually know. this has always been an intriguing element of blogging to me.

i've always been a very private person, and i have surprised myself with some of the things i've written on here. being a private person and harboring a love for writing about life made me realize that if i really wanted to blog, i would have to find a way to protect myself. since writing about my life is what i'm best at, the option of blogging anonymously seemed like the best place to hitch my wagon.

the quandary of blogging and knowing people who read my blog is that i don't always say everything i would if i was 100% anonymous. the counterpoint of the dilemma is that i don't always say everything i would if was 100% identifiable. so to an extent, i guess i censor myself...which is what happens when you allow a very private person the opportunity to share from the safety and protection of a dark, webbed veil.

it's also why i'm gingerly tiptoeing around what i'm trying to say. isn't this a fun little dance we're doing? :) i know it's annoying. i'm sorry.

7. the girls and i were standing in line at target two and a half weeks ago and i heard two people behind me discussing 'the two little girls from figment soup.'

not even kidding.

i slowly turned my head, and they were looking at cee and jay...smiling at them. my girls had no idea why they were being gawked at and went on about their business of being themselves. cee and jay weren't talking loudly enough that i worried they would say each other's names, but i had an 'oh my gosh...' moment that i really can't even begin to describe.

it ranged from 'please don't say your sister's name right now...(cee and jay aren't their real names in case you worried my children were actually named after letters of the alphabet. that really only works for kay. and jay...)' to 'am i buying anything embarrassing?' to 'do i remember where i parked (because sometimes i forget - and a big part of me wanted to grab the girls up and just bolt and run far away, and bolting tends to work best if you know exactly where to run in a crowded parking lot)?' and a million others in between.

i'm serious. and i know that sounds weird, but that's never happened to me before. it was freaky (in a complimentary and unnerving sort of way).

8. i got a nook!!!

9. i've been tossing the same set of questions around in my head every since the girls were recognized. is being mostly anonymous the right thing to do, or would it be better to forego the facade? do i want my girls to be known as 'the figment soup girls'? is it fair to them? do i share too much? should i share more? do you want to play 20 questions? why is the sky blue? where is my nook? why am i still writing about this? why is the sweet genius guy creepy? did i set the alarm? did i lock the front door? is the toilet lid closed (and does it matter?)?

10. sometimes i feel like i ramble and don't make any sense. when it comes down to it, though, i started this blog (almost three years ago!!) as a way to capture my girls' lives as they blossom and grow, as a way to capture the random thoughts that fly around in my head (blogging them makes the flying around part stop), and as a way to stake my claim on the way i view, appreciate, and live my life.

there are lots of things i write that don't end up on here...until i hit 'publish post', though, those other ideas continue to flit around in my head until something bigger takes them over and demolishes their imputable existence.

11. enough of the wishy washy shenanigans...i think it's time to get back to sedaris (on my nook!!). let's call it a night, okay?

12. now that i got all of that off my chest, i think i'll be able to write more. it's really been bugging me. ahhhhh.....i feel much, much better!! thanks for listening. :)

peace and privacy ponderings...

v 37.0 (beta)

2011-11-04T22:11:00.005-05:00

what an amazing day.

i am truly and abundantly blessed to have such incredible people in my life!!

from start to (almost) finish, i couldn't have dreamed up a better day.

the girls spoiled me completely rotten, justin bieber sang me happy birthday, jay offered to light a gummy product on fire for me, and my cake was double chocolate and laced with hersheys, twix, and a ridiculous amount of flames.

good grief, i love those girls.

cee had a horrible nightmare last night. she crawled into bed with me at 3 am, and i didn't ask her then what it was about....i wanted her to be able to sleep and not dwell on the horrors that were pushing her buttons (translation: i needed to sleep).

she told me all about it as soon as she opened her eyes this morning. i am happy to tell you that her nightmare ("the worst one of my entire life") involved copious amounts of....

queso garnished with a chiffonade of basil.

nevermind that i took them trick-or-treating in mexico...we had queso!! with basil!!

and that was the beginning of one of the best days ever. :)

thanks so much to everyone who made it special and fabulous.

muah!!!

(fin)

party of five

2011-11-03T20:36:00.013-05:00

i know you've heard the scenario...'name the four famous people (living or otherwise) in history, you would love to have sitting around your table.'

usually i think it's more than four, but i prefer smaller groups...

i've never been able to adequately answer this question, but through the years i have carefully compiled, added to (and subtracted from) my list. my attention to detail in this matter is impeccable. trust me.

i have left no proverbial stones (or deserving guests) unturned.

and in my quest to assemble my dream team dinner party, i've always ended up with a party of four (including myself) instead of the magic number (five).

i will go ahead and tell you that my children did not make the list. and jesus didn't either (no offense intended at all - i think he's been to more than his fair share of these and is probably happy to be able to send his regrets).

so here it is...my dream team dinner party.

1. princess diana: lovely and fair, kind-hearted and tenacious, public yet stealth, regal and humble, she was a woman of opposite extremes. i'm not sure we would have agreed on what to order or where to go, but i think i could have talked her into walking on the wild side...for at least a block or two. decent chance she could have taught me a few things, too.

2. jfk, jr: because let's be honest...he got the best of the genes from the kennedy crew and the bouvier brood. he was rebellious, but raised well. he was adventurous and liberal, yet refined and restrained. educated, but not boxed in. i cried the day his plane went down...i could still to this day pick his brain with millions of questions over a lovely plate of lobster rolls somewhere in tribeca.

3. nora ephron: what an incredible woman. hysterically funny, brilliant, and witty. a renownded playwright and author. she gave a new name to 'essayist' and had some fabulous experiences along the way. i just need to know more about the ganz collection @ the wynn and about why the wrinkles on her neck are so personally distressing. i'm sure she wouldn't mind shooting the breeze with me...i feel confident that she'd have a glass of vino while we chit chatted.

i have, for years, stumbled here, primarily because i am very aware of gender. i've always wondered how my final participant would factor in to my epic feast. would it contribute towards a testosterone imbalance? would it be female dominated? or a could it be...a perfect balance?

well, i only want five people at my dinner table...so i guess that will automatically skew things slightly....

4. last night i got the proper answer to the question that has been plaguing me for the last seventeen years of my life (although i'm not entirely sure it's been quite that long or quite that short). i went with one of my faves to see david sedaris.

holy sweet jesus...if you've never seen him, you need to. and if you've seen him, you need to see him again. he is incredible and outrageously funny, and i laughed until i cried...five different times.

my blood pressure lowered decisively from the time i was waiting for the doors to open until the time i was waiting to get my car out of the lopsided parking lot at the end of the night.

i'm pretty sure medical doctors should prescribe 'him' as opposed to other more invasive interventions to counter-act life's daily toll.

he rocks. and he is part of my own personalized health plan from here on out.

and he can pick the place...i trust his taste.

so there you have it...my dream team dinner troupe....party of five.

and on the eve of my 37th, with a year full of very few notable accomplishments, i have to tell you something: it feels good to finally have my dream team assembled.

really, really good!

another item to check off my 'to-do list' in life.

who would you invite to your party?

peace and ponderings...

yes, sir.

2011-10-30T21:47:00.008-05:00

i have probably watched this video at least a dozen times in the last year. sir ken robinson rocked in 2006...ken robinson says schools kill creativity | video on ted.com

and he rocked in 2010...sir ken robinson: bring on the learning revolution! | video on ted.com

i wonder where he'll show up next.

if you have just under 20 minutes to spare, take a peek at the creativity one. i bet you'll take a peek at the other one, too.....he's a full-fledged, totally fabulous rock star.

plus he has a cool accent and funny stories. enjoy (if you feel so inclined)!!

peace...

mediocrity meets fabulosity

2011-10-26T19:35:00.006-05:00

today was one of those odd, odd days where nothing really specifically went wrong, but nothing exactly went right. it was just kind of mediocre and blah. my glass was definitely half empty today.

until i got home.

it was trash and recycle day in my 'hood, and i turned onto my street just after the recycle truck.

as my recycle container was hoisted over the edge of the truck, i was shocked to hear the clinking and clanking and shattering...did i have that many wine bottles in there? that would have been the perfect ending to the kind of day i had: another problem....a potential trip to the betty.

i pulled into my garage and got out of my car just in time to hear the next bin being emptied...more clinking and clanking and shattering.

and more and increasingly more from each house after mine.

music to my ears!!!

on a day like i had, it feels good to know that i'm not alone in my bottle collecting activities. my neighbors apparently consume much more "bottled" products than i do, and i quickly put my worries to rest.

sometimes all it takes is something small to turn a mediocre day into a half full kind of day.

click for photo credit

and since then, things are much better. for instance, rocky horror picture show (glee version) is on, i have one more assignment to do for my class, and it's my favorite time of year!! and i'm going to bed early. see? muy better!

peace and production possibilities...

pumpkins for my pumpkins

2011-10-22T14:33:00.004-05:00

it's pumpkin time! my town has the most fabulous, quintessential pumpkin patch, and when we moved here eight years ago, i didn't think it would be such a cool outing to take the girls there year after year.

but year after year, we go back. it's been fun watching them grow up there...

i always tell them they can't get a pumpkin they can't lift. in a few more years, that's going to put a dent in my cash flow, and i hope they never outgrow our trips there.

last night they carved their pumpkins and we roasted pumpkin seeds. mmmmm, mmmmm, yumminess!

tomorrow we are going costume shopping. jay wants to be dorothy, and cee wants to be...a zombie. i'm not 100% comfortable with her dressing up as a zombie, and when i tried to reason with her, here's the answer i got:

mom. it's halloween. you have to bring the full package. i'm talking full glitz. otherwise you won't get any candy. if you don't bring your 'a' game, they're just gonna look at you and say - 'hit the road, buzz kill.'

really?

really.

thus the reason i'm worried that she might outgrow the pumpkin patch tradition soon. hopefully when we're actually shopping for costumes, something fluffy and magical will catch her eye and spur a change of heart. they're both growing up way too fast.

the girls have big plans for tonight, so we're off to prepare for the madness ahead. i hope you and yours have a wonderful fall weekend!!

peace...

cheese

2011-10-21T17:49:00.000-05:00

cheese - the other, other white meat.

i love cheese.

it started in my younger days with a wicked velveeta obsession, and now it's morphed into something real and mature and deep and profound.

cheese and i have had our ups and downs as we've aged. the more i fell in love with cheese, the more i wanted to know about it. cheese doesn't have a poetic story to back up its greatness.

'the poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.' ~g.k. chesterton

tidbits like this are quite the opposite of sexy...'eyes (holes) in cheese develop during the curing process when gas formed in the fermentation stage expands. the release of this gas causes air pockets to form and eventually pop, leaving behind the holes.'

yummy.

science and facts aside, i still have plenty of room in my heart for a good plate of cheese. serve it with bread, serve it with crackers, serve it with fruit, or serve it with deli meats. just don't serve it from a can (please?).

here are a few of my faves...

nancy's hudson valley camembert - sheep's milk and cow's milk. tame and delicious. grate it and plop it in mashed potatoes...i double dog dare you.

triple creme brie (french marin) - you may have to give your arm a pinch so you don't think you've died and gone to heaven. not even kidding.

murray's cave aged cabot clothbound cheddar - it's a mouthful...produced by the likes of this cutie pie...

from wiki

pure luck goat cheese - i'm not a big believer in luck as much as i am blessings, but it's hard to tell the difference between the two when you sink your chops into this deliciousness.

oh my gosh. i just realized that i am completely incapable of finishing this conversation with you because of some dude named troy johnson. he has his own show called crave.

the episode on t.v. right now is entirely dedicated to cheese!!!

check it out when you get a chance...you'll be doing yourself a favor.

i promise.

peace and pasteurization....

chicken nostalgia

2011-10-16T20:05:00.002-05:00

i have been missing two things a whole bunch lately:
-my chickens
-farm fresh eggs

isn't she a beauty?

yeah, i know...a face only a mother could love.

when i was married, we lived on three acres, which was great and all, but more importantly, we lived in an area with no land/livestock restrictions. over five years, we had about 10 chickens. it took me six chickens to figure out how to raise them, and after we went through those unfortunate six, we ended up with four champs.

we had dora, boots, big red, and diet coke. the one in the picture is dora.

when i bought my new house, one of the first things i checked was the livestock restrictions. yup - you guessed it: most home owners' associations tend to frown upon egg-laying fowl. mine included.

if you've never had chickens, i know you're probably thinking that i'm kinda crazy right now, but you're just going to have to trust my self-inflicted sanity claim. they were so tame and friendly, and we could hold them and pet them...and call them george if we wanted to. they weren't picky about their names.

if you've never had fresh chicken eggs, you should totally find some. i'm really not an egg eater anymore since i don't have fresh eggs.

there's something alluring about the deep golden color of fresh eggs when compared to the less-golden-pale-mucky color of grocery store eggs.

did you know chickens only lay one egg per day? it must be very hard work for them. ours got to the point where they would lay them on the grill, which happened to be right next to our back door. when i lived there, we always cooked muffins and pancakes for breakfast. it was not unusual to say, 'girls, go get an egg for me.'

and they would toddle to the back porch, reach up on the grill, and get a brand spankin' new egg. :)

redneck? maybe a little.

good? you betcha.

a friend of mine has recently given thought to buying some land and building a house. she wanted to ask me about chickens. and raising them.

i instantly got so excited for her - maybe a little too excited. and at the same time, i found myself...so sad. about chickens.

i really do miss my chickens. i miss them so much that my next house will definitely not have livestock restrictions.

it's been a pretty great weekend - i caught up with some dear friends, got lots done at home, and i'm completely ready for whatever this week has to offer.

peace and poultry...

the daily chuckle

2011-10-13T21:01:00.001-05:00

i sure do miss my babies on tuesday and wednesday nights.

a lot.

therefore, i look extraordinarily forward to my thursday nights with them.

tonight, like all thursdays, did not disappoint.

scene 1

me: cee, how was your field trip today?

cee: it was so spot-on.

me: did you just say spot-on?

cee: yup. why?

me: just curious...so if there was one part in the play that you could have, what would it be?

cee: the goose.

me: why?

cee: because she got to go to the very edge of the stage, turn around, and shake her booty to the whole entire audience. in a tutu. who gets to do that? it's every girl's dream.

scene 2

jay: mom, you gotta see what i did in my room.

me: (bristling whilst simultaneously holding my breath - because usually this involves a sharpie) oh god. what?

jay: look! (pointing to stickers plastered on her door frame) do you know what these mean?

me: no, what?

jay: this is how tall i was when i was a teeny tiny baby (at the level of my ankles), and this is how tall i'm gonna be when i grow up (at the level of five inches above my head), and thiiiisssss is how tall i'm gonna be when i can google inappropriate things (really? the level is entirely insignificant in this context).

scene 3:

i had their annual teacher conferences earlier this week. usually i smile and nod at the kind compliments and politely say thank you.

this year was not usual. i was seriously so overwhelmed with all of the sweet things their teachers shared with me that one of them offered me a box of tissues. my head and my heart swelled entire dress sizes this year.

the older they get - and the closer they get to the age of students i teach - the more i appreciate the feedback and feel like what i'm doing with them really is paying off.

sometimes i feel like super grinch mom. sometimes i feel like chronic fun-ruiner mom. sometimes i feel like world's worst mom.

but getting such genuine, positive feedback on their ability and behavior and demeanor makes me realize that being a parent really is a hard job. nobody ever told me we wouldn't always get along; nobody ever told me we wouldn't always be smiling and laughing; and nobody ever told me it was okay to have bad days.

it's just the way that our lives have unfolded, and it's reassuring to know that i'm doing something right in the big mess of day-to-day life. it feels really great to discover that the things i'm teaching them are sticking and paying off.

happy hearts make happy homes.

alright - it's bedtime.

peace out and sweet dreams.

worms. everywhere.

2011-10-12T20:50:00.005-05:00

as a teacher, some things strike a chord with me more than others... especially when those things have to do with kids (as they often do in the business of teaching). today was one of those chord-striking kind of days.

the things that kids in my class...and our society...deal with these days seriously amaze me. middle school is that time of my life where you couldn't pay me enough money to do it over again. it's awkward and difficult and transitory...thankfully, it's ephemeral.

i had a kid who got in trouble in my class today and normally this kid isn't the type who would ever, ever get in trouble. as a friend of mine says, 'it's middle school. pretty much all bets are off with predicting their behavior.'

oh, so true.

when school was over, i decided to call home just to make sure the parents were aware of what was going on in class...and to make sure the correct story made it home (shockingly, the reality version isn't always the one that makes it home). parents are typically pretty fabulous about supporting us and if they have a talk with their kid, the next day things are usually infinitely better.

but this wasn't the average phone call home.

sometimes when you call home, you end up opening a can of worms that can't really be closed. today, i accidentally opened a huge can of worms. every question or comment i asked or made ended up creating additional worm holes in the already-gaping can, and the next thing i knew, they were everywhere.

every. where.

if you remember my squirrel fishing extravaganza from this summer, you already know that i really don't like worms in a literal or figurative sense.

it's been four hours since the great worm explosion of 2011, and i have managed to contain the worms in that time, but that's primarily because i'm from the 'supress, don't express' school of repressive thought.

things will be fine, but i am pretty sure this kid needs a huge hug tomorrow for all of the situations they have going on at home.

everything in my life was quickly put into perfect perspective, and i was once again reminded that i'm lucky and blessed and all the other good stuff that goes along with my pollyanna take on life.

sorry to be a downer...here's a little something to make you smile.

dear ms. davis,

i want to be very clear on my child’s illustration. it is not of me on a dance pole on a stage in a strip joint. I work at home depot and had commented to my daughter how much money we made in the recent snowstorm. this photo is of me selling a shovel.

mrs. harrington

peace. :)

turquoise

2011-10-08T09:29:00.001-05:00

i need this in my life today. i think i'm gonna make that happen.

from gracious southern living

perhaps today is the day that a plethora of pretty pumpkins will possibly and probably permeate my presence.

peace!

lucky stars

2011-10-05T20:44:00.002-05:00

i have always considered myself an extraordinarily lucky person.

not lucky in the way of picking just the right slot machine in vegas or lucky like buying the winning lottery ticket at just the right time or lucky like having someone knock on my front door with balloons, a hidden camera, and a check for a million dollars from publisher's clearinghouse (made out to me, of course).

maybe blessed is a better word than lucky because i do think that i have extra peeps watching over me. maybe i require more 'attention' than the average earthling. i don't know. i'm not generally a high maintenance person, but it's quite possibly because there are extra invisible forces looking after me.

this morning, i proved this point to myself.

again.

i could not sleep last night. i tossed. i turned. i benadryled. all to no avail...

i sent an email to two co-workers at 9:30 thinking maybe if i got the one kid who was keeping me up off of my mind, i could sleep.

nope. no luck, no sleep. nada.

all night, i kept thinking i'd forgotten something.

this morning, i groggily made my way to the dryer to fluff my outfit. i heard bird(s) in my garage (this is not normal).

i had cracked my garage last night because it was getting kind of 'time for the trash man to come' smelling...you know?

before i went to bed last night, i hit the garage door button and just assumed it closed. when i heard the bird(s) this morning, i figured a bird had spent the night in my garage, and then i groaned because i knew i'd left my sunroof open and i figured there would probably be a nest or a nice pile of poo awaiting me in my car.

i carefully, slowly opened the door from my house to my garage, thinking of the caption 'teacher dies when angry birds attack.' my eyes were actually closed (birds peck).

when i opened my eyes, my jaw hit the ground. somehow, i'd managed to leave my garage door open all night long.

i closed the door (thinking that would make it go away?)...

in a split second, my mind starting totaling the potential damage....

when i opened the door again, i realized that my garage door had, in fact, been open all night long and closing it again would not erase this fact.

i also realized a series of sickening oversights...

the sunroof was open.

my car was unlocked.

my purse was in the front seat...

(with my wallet in it).

my brand new order of checks that i'd gotten from the mailbox yesterday was also laying in the front seat.

the keys to my car were in the console (i have a logical reason for doing this...).

the keys to my house were under the doormat.

"hello, wicked people - please come steal my identity or take my life."

that's the banner that may as well have been hanging in front of my house...with a giant strobe light beckoning traffic and bad guys.

i quickly assessed all the potential things that could have been violated or stolen, thinking that angry bird(s) pecking my eyes out might be better than the worst case scenario.

guess what...

not a thing was missing or out of place.

there were even two amstel lights left over from the weekend that were in my car monday morning before school...i put them on the floor of my garage before i left because i thought that probably wouldn't be a good thing to have in my car at school.

beers? fully intact.

after i determined that nothing had been taken...or touched (or sipped), i breathed maybe the hugest sigh of relief ever (while shutting the garage door).

can you believe that?

i still can't.

and that's why i think i have lucky stars and a small army of guardian angels.

i'm exhausted and ready to crash. i'm sure the angels who were watching over my garage are ready to hit the hay, too.

have you ever felt that lucky? i hope you have...it's a great feeling.

combine that with a fabulous dinner with two of my faves and you have the framework for a stellar day.

tonight my garage is closed, my purse is inside, my car is locked, the house keys are no longer under the doormat, the alarm is on (just like it is every night), and i am a very thankful and grateful lady with a very peaceful (albeit tired) heart.

goodnight!

two things

2011-09-29T20:54:00.006-05:00

one: where did september go!?!?

two: you are dangerously close to a proud mom bragging moment. feel free to bail, i will totally understand and i won't judge you for it.

okay, there. you were amply warned and if you're still here, it's by choice. thank you. :)

i knew (and hoped) something was up today when i pulled up to get the girls from school. i saw cee run over to jay and whisper in her ear. jay smiled and nodded and they high fived. this is usually bad news for me.

last week cee came home with an application to run for student council. she was so excited about it, and i was a little nervous. i signed her form and told her we would work on her speech and give it the old college try.

i was thinking letterman top 10-esque (which i realize now is so not cool for the 3rd grade crowd).

she thought my ideas were too 'fluffy.'

therefore, she wrote her speech on her own. here's what she came up with...

'i'm very thinkative and i know not a lot of people use thinkative in a speech, but that's how i roll.' ♥

i can't even tell you how impressed i was with her words...or her grammar...or her voice...or her font & color selection skills. the accomplishment of this speech alone was one of those fabulous mom moments. we practiced after school yesterday.

'are you ready? do you feel good about it?' i asked her.

her smile was the only answer i needed.

when i walked into their school today, jay immediately told me, 'mom, cee didn't get it.'

i looked at cee and she couldn't contain her smile for even a second - 'i got it!'

i'm not sure i've ever been this kind of proud before.

this is the first time she's ever said, 'hey - i really, really want to do this...and i'm going to do whatever it takes to get it. i need your help.'

we started her in soccer and we sent her to soccer camp and we keep signing her up to play each year. and she amazes us on the field and we encourage her to keep gaining more skills...but this?

this was all her own effort and hard work.

purely organic.

i'm pretty sure i couldn't be any prouder of her if i tried!

i know this is the first of many goals she'll set for herself (and achieve), i know there will likely be some heartbreaks along the way, and i know that cee is one determined child. i've always known that, but this is the first time i've really seen the whole process unfold in her very own hands.

watching jay brag about cee was pretty cool, too. the admiration jay has for cee is something i wish i could bottle and sell. i am blessed and amazed by these girls each and every day.

today was just more of a shining example. :)

okay, thanks for reading along with me. i appreciate it!

peace...

strep-tacular

2011-09-27T20:07:00.005-05:00

have you ever woken up and wished that you could have a mulligan for the entire day before your feet even hit the floor? like wished it from the moment your eyes opened? that was how my day started.

do-over, please.

jay bird was sick all night.

sleepless + fever = no bueno.

she has been horizontal for pretty much the whole day.

after a quick trip to the doctor and a diagnosis of strep throat, we have acquired some fabulous antibiotics and a gigantic tootsie roll, and i am happy to report that she's on the mend...you have to imagine the gatorade stains are her real smile. try hard.

having a sick little one is enough to make anyone call dibs on a mulligan, but in addition to the fever, i am now dead last in my fantasy football league. i'm sure it's not normal to be this attached to winning, but i am. it's how i'm wired. i can't help it.

last year i was the league champion (as i am painfully reminded each time i log in to check my current level of bottom-dweller loser-dom), and now i am the low man on the proverbial totem pole. this doesn't make me happy.

not a bit.

on the bright side of things, it's a stormy night, i have on my flannel babushka pj's, we're going to bed early and sleeping late, i have a sub tomorrow, and jay is starting to feel better!

oh - and those fluffy friends she's snuggling? yeah...they're affectionately known as 'big turty' and 'little turty.' this is funny to me...except for when she refers to them in public.

alright - we're off to catch ourselves some zzzzz's. tomorrow will be better.

it has to be.

peace....

as fluffy as a cloud

2011-09-23T20:29:00.003-05:00

i got a new bed yesterday, and it's as fluffy as a cloud (that's a simile).
i'm not even kidding you (about the bed, its fluff factor, or the simile).

i slept better last night than i have in a really, really, long time.

in honor of the fact that my classes just finished a week of poetry, here's a super duper special little treat for you: a haiku.

ode to my new bed

my bed is so tall.
the matress is way fluffy.
i love it a lot.

browning? not so much.
too bad he can't jump that high.
no more dog hair dreams!

snoozing delights me.
the cozy feather topper
really floats my boat.

please don't jump on it...
it's not a tempurpedic.
spilled wine makes me sad.

i strongly believe:
you're never too old for naps.
they fix everything.

the sun is sleeping,
the moon is shining brightly
(okay, that's a lie).

please do not disturb---
tomorrow is quite busy.
goodnight and sweet dreams.

perfection

2011-09-18T15:04:00.004-05:00

what a completely fabulous weekend! a cool front moved in (i use the term lightly), we finally got some rain, the girls were with me, it's football season, and this is hands down my most favorite time of the year.

for as long as i can remember, fall's entrance gives my spirit the hugest boost, and this weekend was no different. i have a few pictures to share.

we went to the acl festival saturday...i wanted the girls to see alison krauss. she had a pretty fabulous crowd to entertain...

and the girls had a pretty nice view of her show.

robert plant was about 20 feet to jay's right...just hanging out, watching his prodigy. kinda cool.

my little rock stars got a chance to sparkle and shine...

jay loved skrillex, which is so right up her alley. she really wanted to be on the other side of the fence in the middle of the madness.

this morning cee decided she wanted to knit, and my soul honestly smiled when she got the hang of it.

and this is a shot of them doing their thing...making my heart flutter.

on top of all of that, i finished my 3rd class, football is on, my fantasy team is rockin' along, and the sky looks completely relaxed.

what a wonderful weekend. what a wonderful world (can you hear louis armstrong in the background? skies of blue? come on, i know you can).

peace!

blog spawn

2011-09-13T22:22:00.009-05:00

i have a bromeliad. i call him bro, and my aunt (the one who loves to travel) brought him to me the summer before cee was born. bro is still alive and kickin', and i have considered this a major accomplishment over the course of the last nine years of my life.

after all, the last plant i ever named was ivy, and ivy didn't make it more than a couple of months. that was 'back in the old days'...before cell phones and the internet.

last weekend i noticed that bro seemed to be a little under the weather, so i googled to find out what i could do to make him better. when a good watering didn't do the trick, i deduced that maybe it was time for bro to make a move to a bigger pot. i thought maybe he was having growing pains.

when i googled 'transplanting bromeliads,' i was completely shocked to discover that bromeliads are supposed to make pups. spawn. little ones.

bro has never made a spawn. or a pup. or a little one.

i instantly felt like a bad curator.

i wondered what i was doing wrong.

i wondered if applauding his nine years was actually an accomplishment...if he had nothing to show for it, had i really done my job?

i still don't have an answer for you, but bro is now happily living in a bigger pot. his roots were jam packed and dying to stretch out a little bit. i'm sure they're all happily adapting to their new digs.

i'm still concerned about the fact that there have been no spawn.

in the meantime, the girls have decided that they want to have a blog.

i have tossed this around in my head so much in the last few days. on one hand, it would be kind of cool. they understand the privacy issues and realize that they would have to limit what they could say.

on the other hand, do they really have anything to say?

and for that matter, do i?

again - my mind has explored every facet of this request of theirs.

last weekend i did a test drive with them. what would you say? i asked them. what would you call it? i pressed. how often would you update?

they decided to have a sister conference - this is a meeting of the minds on a level you've never experienced...trust me.

thirty minutes later, they came back and they were ready to report their conference notes to me.

thing two reported, we want to call it sixteen words.

thing one added, because every post would only be sixteen words long.

thing two included, because we aren't very old yet and we might not have a lot to say.

i checked. sixteen words was available (it's not anymore...just in case).

i told them i loved it. i really did.

i was quite impressed with their thought process.

then i asked them to give me a sample of what they would write.

well, we would right about all kinds of stuff! like what we did at school and how funny things are and jokes and what weird things browning eats and why you're a funny mom and what books we're reading...

i asked for a solid example...in sixteen words.

well, we would right about all kinds of stuff! like what we did at school and how funny things are and jokes and what weird things browning eats and why you're a funny mom and what books we're reading...

i'm still beyond impressed with their concept; i'm just not sure if it's doable, and beyond that, i'm not sure if it's over the top for my kids to have a blog. who would read it? why would those people read it? how bad of an idea is it? how good of an idea is it? and of course...is it completely ridiculous to even entertain the idea?

i thought and thought and thought of what i would post if i had a blog of sixteen words per post. here's the best i came up with:

remember the pink panther dead ant joke? i used to think it was funny. it's not.

that took me two hours.

on a side note, cee and i had the best conversation the other day.

me: how was your weekend?

cee: it was great. guess what - i'm allergic to hippies.

if that's true, i guess austin isn't the best locale for us.

our conversation continued...

cee: so, you know how you said i'm too old to wear tight stretch pants now?

me: yes.

cee: well, dad's special friend wears them. and she's way older than me.

me: yes...and that's another reason why you can't wear them anymore.

cee: okay, cool.

that's why we get along really well right now. i know these days are numbered.

we were having some major issues with the tight stretch pants in our house...there were some 'situations' going on that nobody should have to deal with.

some day she will understand. maybe some day i will, too.

until next time, please be nice to your plants and your children. the world will thank you for it, i promise.

peace and proactive parenting...

9.11.1.

2011-09-11T18:48:00.004-05:00

i am a news junkie and have been for as long as i can remember. it wasn't out of the ordinary that i was watching the today show at exactly 7 am my time ten years ago today (8 am eastern time), and i was just about to leave for work. matt lauer and katie couric announced that a plane had crashed into the world trade center, and life as we all knew it changed forever.

i tried calling the girls' dad probably a million times that morning and couldn't get through to him. not knowing what else to do, i drove to work. at that time, work was smack dab in the middle of downtown austin...my building was at 9th and congress, less than three blocks from the state capitol.

one of the ladies i worked for had been the head of p.r. for nbc in new york. the other woman i worked for grew up around the white house scene - her dad was a white house press secretary, and neither of them were new to disasters. nevertheless, we were all shocked. we watched the towers fall together, we watched a co-worker's devastation because her uncle worked in the world trade center, and we sat together in stunned bewilderment.

somewhere in the midst of the madness, i did hear from the girls' dad...he had been dove hunting with a friend and had no idea what happened until about 10 that morning. i heard from each and every one of my loved ones that day - even if we hadn't talked in months, everybody wanted to check in that day. just in case...

we had a very eerie insight about the pentagon before it was even on the news...the lady who had worked for nbc was on the phone with jim miklaszewski, and he was at the pentagon when it happened. the courage my bosses had was what kept me together that day.

we couldn't help but wonder if the capitol was next, and even though there were no skyscrapers in austin at that time, being 15 stories in the air seemed way too high on a day when the strongest of buildings were crumbling.

time seemed to stop for a few weeks while the country united and held itself together...piece by piece, person by person, day by day. a couple of wars and a couple of presidents later, we are still standing strong.

ten years later, i have two precious daughters who didn't have to live through that horrible day. that's a blessing i can cherish. i love that they will always remember this day not as one of tragedy and horror, but instead one where we celebrate the heroes who have worked so hard to make our lives as safe as possible.

i am so proud of how our country put on its big girl panties that day, i am so proud of how we managed to make lemonade out of lemons, and i am so thankful for the work that happens to keep us safe that we aren't even aware of.

i hope my girls...and the post 9/11 generation...never have to experience the kind of upheaval the rest of us witnessed that day. i really do. more than you'll ever know. and from the bottom of my heart, i leave you with this tonight:

peace...

smokin'

2011-09-06T21:29:00.002-05:00

the fires continue. this morning when i woke up, i went to the back door to put browning out. i was completely overhwelmed to find that the smoky smell had arrived at my house overnight. when i dropped the girls off at school, the sun was just clearing the cloud-smoke bank. it was beautiful and eerie at the same time, and i so wish i would have had my camera. plenty of people have been snapping pictures highlighting the scope and depth of this monstrosity.

courtesy of msnbc

from kxan

my sweet friend who lives in bastrop couldn't make it to work today (and if i were her, i'm not sure i would have been able to mentally make it to school) because all roads leading out of bastrop towards work have been closed. she said there really are no words to describe the horror.

from kvue

and finally, one last shot from west austin overlooking downtown into the skyline over bastrop.

courtesy of deanna roy

i know those of you who read my little blog and live nearby are familiar with all of the images and updates on the news, but for those of you who are farther away, i tried to pick pictures that humbly give a little bit of credence to what this fire is doing.

please send out karmatic wishes, and above all - prayers.

ablaze

2011-09-05T17:20:00.003-05:00

what a crazy turn the weekend has taken. there are wildfires all around due largely in part to the drought, and yesterday the wind was out of control. from this map, i live roughly right in the center...i am pretty far away from all the madness, and it's really disheartening to know that so many people are losing their homes as i write this.

http://austinist.com/2011/09/04/central_texas_ablaze_thousands_of_a.php

i have a sweet friend in bastrop who has avoided the fires, but the school that's literally less than a block from her house is serving as an evacuation sight. she said it looks like a scene from a movie. if you aren't familiar with that area, there's a river that intersects the town, and the fire is on the opposite side of the river from her.

the girls have been glued to the news and i've been really surprised at how much they understand about the destruction. we went to the store earlier and they wanted to buy supplies to donate. we bought a few things but it seems like so little that it pales in comparison to what people are actually losing. it made me wonder what i would take out of our house if we were in these people's shoes. i'm not even sure where i'd start or if i'd be able to get enough.

but then again, what is enough? as long as the girls and i (and browning) got out safely, we would figure it out and make things work. i know there are things we would miss, but we would have our necessities. i hope all the people who are losing their homes have at least made it out with their families.

prayers would be appreciated for everyone to stay safe and out of harm's way...especially the firefighters who are out there in the midst of the danger. if you feel so inclined, i know the red cross is taking donations to help those people who've had to evacuate and/or have lost their homes.

peace...

no more warm fuzzies

2011-09-01T22:24:00.006-05:00

a month ago, i was convinced that my dog was a verbal genius. during my second grad school class, i thought it would be interesting to see how sharp his auditory processing was. i devised a test: would he be able to tell the difference between 'get your ball' and 'get your bowl'?

he passed with flying colors.

somewhere in between my admiration of his stellar phonemic skills and testing my hypothesis ('my dog can distinguish between the short a and long o sounds'), i created a monster. now i think he's simply a four legged- freak who learned a new party trick.

you know how sometimes people love their dog too much, but when you see their dog you don't think it's cute and instead you think it looks kind of creepy? it's a good thing browning's eyes and gray face don't make him look like one of those creepy, glowy-orb-eyed dogs.

oh, wait. never mind. hmmm....

is it a little better when i turn the flash off?

this is what happens when he gets frustrated with my linguistic experiments because let's be honest: all he wants is a bowl full of food and a good ear rub.

how about when he's asleep? cuter?

i love him a whole super lot (even though he didn't try to save us from the wayward light fixture that carelessly leapt from our ceiling earlier this week...prompting a terror-ridden 9-1-1 false alarm call that i fear has put me on the idiot watch list with my local law enforcement agency).

also, i have to tell you something really important...i'm probably entirely responsible for perpetuating this new bad/annoying habit of his.

every time he brings that bowl to me, i throw it and i either tell him to 'fetch' or 'catch.' he isn't having quite as easy a time with the /f/ and the /k/ as he did with the vowel sounds. therefore, he's still in the throes of emergent literacy. don't worry, though. it's all part of the process.

maybe this weekend i'll teach him to retreat and drop. i have three days.

he can totally handle that.

nice view

2011-08-31T21:51:00.002-05:00

i have a new mission in life, and it has a whole bunch to do with this.

photo from artec

in case you haven't heard, anderson has a talk show and it premiers in 12 days! i've been vaguely aware that the show was coming up soon, but i didn't realize how soon, and i also didn't realize how uninformed i was about it.

the picture above is from lincoln center...the allen room. that's where the show is being housed, and as much as i can't get over how soon the fun begins, i seriously cannot get over how incredible the view from the theater is.

this 90 x 50 foot monstrosity of glass overlooks central park, and i am in serious l-o-v-e with every bit of it. can you even imagine watching it with a rainy new york day as the backdrop? the lighting is completely fantastic and delicious.

and on a snowy new york day?

two words: oh. my.

it just might be too much for me to process.

around the studio

for the last two hours, i've been feverishly trying to determine how i'm going to balance getting all my school (squared) work done and squeeze in anderson at 4.

so far, the best i can think of is that i will lock myself in my classroom (with the lights off) at 3:59, i will hide under a desk, and i won't leave until 5:01. this solution is obviously not ideal, and i have never wanted dvr in my whole life because i'm not a dvr kind of person.

until now.

it might be time.

i've also never wanted to be part of a live studio audience.

until now.

it might be time.

okay, i officially sound like a middle-aged lunatic.

i need sleep...and a long weekend.

peace...

travel woes

2011-08-28T12:34:00.003-05:00

i am dying to go on a trip. i really want to take the girls to santa monica for a weekend because i know they'd love the pier, the beaches, and the shops. and of course the ferris wheel. and probably the roller coaster.

https://bintheknow.wordpress.com/2011/03/29/the-road-ahead/

i'd also love to take them to new york (after irene is gone) and stay in a little tucked away boutique hotel on the upper west side so they can experience the greatness that is central park in the fall.

http://javed-sultan.blogspot.com/2011/03/new-york-central-park-cool-picture.html

not sure i'll be able to take them on either of these any time soon, and i'm sure i'll find a way to pacify my wanderlust with a local getaway (oxymoron?)...and in the meantime, my mom was just offered the most incredible travel opportunity...beyond what i could have ever dreamed!

my aunt loves to travel, and she transports herself to southeast asia as often as she can...usually two to three times a year. she loves singapore, and i think that city (slash country?) owns a serious chunk of her soul. my aunt is a pretty cool, worldly lady who lives to travel and write.

she writes for the forbes/mobil travel guide and several other publications (she basically gets paid to travel and write about how fabulous traveling is), and she's also a college professor. a few years ago, she received a fulbright scholarship that took her to northern tunisia to...you guessed it: write. she spent eight weeks chilling on the sands of the mediterranean writing about what she saw.

she's kind of my rock star academia idol (if there is such a thing), and i want to be her when i grow up some day.

she has invited my mom to go with her on her next adventure this november. leaving from houston, they would go to moscow, singapore, thailand, laos, and back home via singapore.

the only hitch is that my aunt would stay a lot longer than my mom, and my mom would have to travel home alone. i see this as a very minor problem in the equation, but since my mom is pretty much blind (did you know that?), there are some obstacles that might surface. i think all she needs is a travel buddy, and being the doting daughter that i am, i volunteered my services without thinking twice.

but after a second thought, i realized that her trip is in the middle of my school year, i would miss the girls infinitely, i have tickets to david sedaris, and the preponderance of what ifs quickly clouded my thoughts.

and now i think a trip to the beach - with the girls in tow - would totally float my boat.

http://www.thailandtravelling.com/

negligible difference, right? only the expertly trained eye can determine which beach is in texas and which is in asia.

oh well - a girl can dream.

peace and pacific(ish) ponderings...

friday

2011-08-26T05:37:00.001-05:00

because you're dying to know, i'm going to tell you my dream from last night (you're welcome).

i moved into a beautiful, fully furnished, brand new three bedroom condo with vintage wood plank floors, 10 ft. ceilings, marble countertops, huge closets, two convection ovens, bosch appliances, an island with a reclaimed wood top, a farm sink, and my very own laminator, copier, and heavy duty glue gun.

it was connected to my classroom, and it had expectations on the walls instead of art. instead of drywall, there were whiteboards (which could actually be pretty fun). and there was border ev. ree. where.

i think this is nature's way of telling me two things: 1) it's been a long week; 2) i'm not allowed to go to school this weekend.

happy friday to you!

peace...

eleven

2011-08-24T20:47:00.003-05:00

that's how old the average kid in my class is right now. that means most of them were born in 1999, and that hits kind of close to home this year. cee was born in 2002, and 1999 is really, really close to 2002. too close for my comfort.

i can't imagine cee and jay growing up any faster than they already are. sometimes i feel like they grow an inch every time i turn my back. i have lots of friends with new babies right now, and it seriously seems like yesterday when cee and jay were trying baby food for the first time or getting their first fever or their first tooth or starting to crawl.

and now they're in 1st grade and 3rd grade. i think this is a question i'll ask myself a lot in the coming years...where did the time go?

where did the summer go? i feel like there is so much i wanted to do with them and so much that i promised them we would do and so much that we didn't get to check off our list.

coulda, shoulda, woulda aside...

school started monday, and they were seriously beyond excited about it...i was excited, too.

this was them on the first day of school, and i hesitated to post this because everybody posts a picture of their kid(s) on the first day of school. i love seeing everyone's pictures of their kids on the first day of school! everyone is so shiny and crisp and new!

i thought i'd wait and post a picture of them on the second day of school to separate myself from the crowd a little bit...but i forgot to take a picture of them on the second day.

they've been with their dad for the last two nights, and 'the fifth day of school' doesn't sound quite as groovy as 'the first day of school.'

a very sweet lady who i teach with sent her daughter off to college over the weekend. i cannot imagine how scary that feeling must be, and i will continue my attempts to convince the girls to live at home until they are at least 35.

the weird thing to me about being a parent is that i know what my kids look like in reality, but in my mind they still look a lot more like this...

and this...

but then they say things that make them sound so not one and three anymore, but instead every bit of first and third. and before i know it, they'll sound eleven or every bit of eleventh.

and then i say things like, 'girls, just let me get one good picture...'

and they do, and i can't help but wonder where the time went.

i guess that's just what parents do, right?

i'm ready for the weekend with them so we have some time to kick back and catch up.

alright, back to studying.

peace...

the chair

2011-08-21T15:04:00.001-05:00

'orange ghetto chair is temporarily living in lab 198. that's a chair only you could love.' -fb post to the person who used to be in room 127 from the person who is now in room in 127.

ahhh, the chair with a face only its mother could love...and only in my school!

about four years ago, someone decided that a nice reward/welcome back to school surprise for teachers would be to buy some updated, ergonomically supportive chairs for our desks instead of the orange chairs we've all come to know and love.

i know i wasn't the only one who was overwhelmed at the loss. although i appreciated the gesture, i felt like someone had kidnapped my offspring in the middle of the night.

fortunately, we got our old chairs back, riots were avoided, and everyone was happy to have their security blankets. i'll never let mine go again.

someone else commented on the facebook post, 'i guess not everyone can lean like a cholo.'

these chairs have some serious tilt action...probably less by design and more by age. if you aren't expecting it, you might feel a little on edge sitting in them...like the rides that take you way up high and then drop you at random intervals. the leanability is off the charts, but these chairs are relentlessly faithful. some might call them tempermental, but once you get to know them, they are harmless.

back to the facebook post from thursday.

that was one of the days that we had our computer labs open for parents who needed to complete online registration for their students. we had lots of people in and out of the computer labs. at one point, nobody else was in there with me who knows about the orange chairs.

someone came in with a gigantic drink in hand, plopped in the orange chair and got ready to register. approximately 20 seconds later, i saw the most incredible display of panic that i've ever witnessed. it was you-tube-able. the person barely leaned back in the chair, drink in hand, and the sly, orange chair played its card. this person thought they were going down for the count, and they were determined to save their drink in the process.

it was completely amazing.

this person didn't know the chair, and that was the main problem. the orange chairs are so loyal and would never hurt anyone on purpose. sometimes they'll test your trust, but they'll never let you down.

it was great (but exhausting) to get back into a routine last week. the girls were here and there, so i was able to get a lot done. i finally got to catch up with them on friday at one of my most favorite restaurants, and it seems that while they were gone, they learned a new photo pose.

they are so ready to go back to school. they keep asking me to start dinner, and they are willingly going to lay down at 7 tonight (their idea, not mine). outfits have been selected, supplies are ready to be put to work, papers are signed, and tomorrow will be a very exciting day!

i have to admit, i'm ready to get the new school year started, too!!

peace...

oh, anderson...

2011-08-18T22:23:00.000-05:00

...yet another of the many reasons i love him. if you can get to the 2:35 mark, i think you'll be right there with me.

today was kind of a long day, and i totally needed it to end with a good, hearty laugh!! thanks, ac.

(brought to you by the letter p...)

m.i.s.s.

2011-08-15T05:24:00.001-05:00

i miss them already. i never sleep very good when they're too far away, and i'm pretty sure the opposite is supposed to happen.

i know they'll have a great week. after a sleepless couple of hours, i guess it's time for me to get this school year started. happy monday. :)

peace.

count down

2011-08-13T15:40:00.007-05:00

it's that time of year: the time when my calendar goes from looking like this...

to this...

and i love it!

don't get me wrong - i'm not showing you my calendar because i'm presuming that i'm the busiest mom who ever existed. i know there are other moms (and dads and families) who are much busier than me and are managing truck loads more than what i attempt.

it's just that i love the brand of busy that comes with each new school year. we are creatures of habit, and routine suits us perfectly well. somebody once told me that teaching isn't a real job, and i still laugh at that when each school year starts because i don't think that person would last a day in a classroom and still make it out alive. :)

the official count down is on for back-to-school. the girls leave tomorrow to stay with the grandparents for a few days, i start back to school monday, and i'm ready. but i might be pretty quiet on the blog next week.

have i ever told you about the people at my school? i work with a group of completely awesome educators, and some of them are practically like family. it's always fun to see everyone and figure out what we're going to do to make each year better than the last. you know that saying about do what you love and love what you do? well, i think co-workers should be incorporated into that, too.

enough waxing nostalgic...i have to tell you what keeps me marginally organized. it's this incredible creation right here...

(pens not included with purchase)

it has been my organizational bff for the last three years, and i used to look forward to perusing the shelves at borders for just the right one. no more of that (sadness).

one of my most favorite people introduced me to the beauties of family_time dot mine several years ago, and i'm carrying her spirit forward at school since she's devoted her self to the ranks of retired life all in the name of spending some quality time with her family. but i guarantee you her family_time dot mine calendar is still going to be packed to the brim (with fantasy football commissioner duties and reserving tables at bars).

i have to warn you that this is something you need in your life. it comes with instructions, but only so you can experience every ounce of its awesomeness, and not because it is overly complicated to use.

with next week's guarantees of super busy, i thought the quote at the bottom of my calendar page was completely apropos.

'balance is not a static state but is like a pendulum that swings from side to side...' ~judith hansen laseter

that's just another reason the calendar rocks. like your horoscope, the quote almost always applies to your life however you need it to. free interpretation...not an easy thing to incorporate.

on a side note, my new grad school class starts on monday and i have assignments due throughout the week. this will be my first real taste of melding school with school...i am a little apprehensive.

alright - the girls and i are off to sow our last-minute summer oats.

what's that? you want to see a picture of them? oh, okay.

this is them with their new 'thing one' and 'thing two' buttons from the ever-fabulous jftb (and football season tattoos...they couldn't wait).

peace...

plea bargain

2011-08-11T09:57:00.009-05:00

'please let Your will be the exact same as mine.'

yup - those words went through my mind yesterday, and immediately afterward i realized it was the plea of a former strong-willed child. i think it's supposed to be 'Your will be done.' period. oops.

i immediately apologized for my psychedelic nonsense and simultaneously said thanks because my strong-willed-ness had, in fact, been the exact same as that of the big guy up stairs.

my mom had surgery yesterday to repair a blocked artery in her leg (thus the pleaful prayer), and for some reason i was very nervous about it. she came through with flying colors (i'm fully attributing this to my strong-willed thoughts).

my mom had an awesome surgeon, and i'm hoping he'll be in my class this year (he looked about 11 and i bet he's a strong reader)...and i think we're both beyond ready to be back at my house (my mom and me...not the surgeon and me...is their a comma for that? there should be - that could be a dangerous confusion!).

this was my bed last night...it is called a sofa bed. hmmm...

i know, i know. it's not all about me...but at least my mom had some good drugs to help her sleep. me? not so much. in a few hours, i'll probably be asking, 'does this floor i'm laying on make me look unmotivated?'

there is something about hospitals that i have always loved...and i caught myself checking out all the gadgets and gizmos and enjoying the symphony of sounds that are part of a hospital's fabric (and found some of them to be more of a cacophony in the wee hours of the night) and counting how many wireless routers are mounted in the hallways (eight per side of each pod) and determining how many ceiling tiles there are per room and calculating the fluorescent to non-florescent lighting ratio.

i also wondered what people on bed rest do during fire drills and how many loads of laundry the hospital does each day and how much the electric bill is for a place like this in the heat of summer...i've worn a hoodie for the entire time i've been here, and i really wish i had a sweatshirt.

alright - it's time to start packing up our things. maybe that will make the paperwork get done quicker. which means we can pick up cee and jay quicker, and that makes everyone happier. quicker! it's practically instant gratification...in slow motion...running through molasses.

our stay here has been great, and the only thing i would suggest for the hospital's improvement is the addition of this pain scale to their standard operating procedure manual. just for grins. :)

peace and polite pleas...

holy cows

2011-08-09T22:41:00.002-05:00

remember bear hunts when you were a kid? well, today i took the girls on a cow hunt. the cow parade is in austin, and it was the last big thing we had to check off our summer list. yes, summer is quickly coming to an end. with our trusty map in hand, we set out early so we could avoid the heat.

we started out in zilker park because...well, that's where the map started, i guess. the girls were so excited but that exhilaration soon turned to 'are you sure we're in the right place?' after aimlessly wandering through the park...for an hour...without seeing a single cow. like changing a propane tank, finding the cows in the park was something i was dead set on accomplishing.

we decided to head down town because i knew there would be cows there...we found lots more, and they were cuter than i could have imagined! there was the shady grove peace cow...

the love cow (which i thought was so marilyn monroe)...

jay was partial to the running cow (and cee loved this cow's shoes)...

and cee liked this vintage-y looking guy...

remember how i told you we couldn't find any when we first started? well, we later discovered that the installation isn't entirely complete. this guy (errr...girl) was fresh off the farm.

this one was fashionably late...in high style.

but hands down, all three of us found 'moo-sey in the sky with diamonds' to be our favorite of the day.

they'll be in town through the end of october, and if you have a chance to catch a peek at them, i know you'll love them. i'm pretty sure we'll head out on another cow hunt whenever things cool off...we still have at least 20 more cows to see.

i head back to school next week, and i'll be spending the rest of this week taking care of some family things...this was a great way to say good bye to a wonderful summer, and i'm looking forward to a fabulous school year.

but i am really, really, really going to miss my free time with things one and two. a whole lot.

alright...that's all for now, tomorrow comes with an early start.

peace...

report card

2011-08-07T14:54:00.009-05:00

i got my grade for my 2nd class today - a! grad school has been a good 'walk a mile in someone else's shoes' experience for me because i am totally empathizing with how my own class of students feel.

1) thanks to the gre i will totally be able to empathize with the ones who get test anxiety. i finally got my official scores, and i did okay on the reading and math...i kinda kicked butt on the writing part (whilst taking names). ;)

2) i am totally the kid who needs to get a's. i fully understand the difference between needs and wants, and for me, a's are a true need. i have missed 3 points, and those 3 points are driving me bonkers. so from here forward, i don't want to lose any points. at all. no pressure, right? i have a whole new outlook on kids who need a's.

3) i am not very patient when it comes to waiting for my grades, and i think i'll be a much quicker grader this year. and i will never make a kid wait to see their grades or the grade book. okay - i say this now...things could change.

last week when i got my official BlogHer sidebar ad, i also signed up for google analytics. in layman's terms, it's basically a report card for how the blog is doing and what i can do to generate traffic.

i didn't realize how detailed the information would be, and i'm now rethinking analytics. but now that i know about it, and being the kid who needs a's, i kind of need analytics.

i am a little bit freaked out by some of the results it generated. i can tell what the referring site was for visitors, i can tell which posts attract the most attention, and i can tell what internet provider people are using when they visit. weird, right?

you know what's even weirder? i had 14 visits from the u.s. department of justice. that freaks me out a little bit. i'm not sure why, but i am sure i haven't done anything too terribly bad.

and finally, i can tell which countries are providing traffic. the most surprising? romania, bangladesh, denmark, south korea, and russia. okay - there are two more, and in all fairness, i have no earthly idea where they are...latvia and slovenia? where are you??

but don't worry - none of the analysis is detailed enough that i'd ever be able to know specifics...so keep reading, okay? please? i'm practically begging you.

so...if i was having sleep trouble before, this new information is guaranteed to put that trouble onto the fast track at warp speed...all in the name of massive anxiety. therefore, i got a little 5 mg friend at the pharmacy today...ambien!! i am completely giddy about it, too!

alright, thing one and thing two should be home before too long, so it's time to roll out the welcome mat for my lovely little ladies.

peace and progress...

the keys to my heart

2011-08-05T19:06:00.003-05:00

after i finished my to-do list for today, i decided i'd take advantage of my last opportunity to clean house before things get chaotic with the back-to-school madness. next week is filled to the brim, the girls are gone for the weekend, and it's time to tie up all the loose ends of my summer endeavors.

while i was cleaning, i found reason number 549,158 that i love having little girls. so tell me...do you notice anything unusual about this picture?

oh - i'm not talking about the fact that my crosses are not centered over my piano or that my piano is not centered under my crosses (but i have added that to my to-do-before-school-starts list), and i'm not talking about the unframed pictures on the music rack (i'm still in search of the perfect frames for those)...or the magic 8 ball.

i'm talking about the daycare that's taken up residence at the intersection of baldwin and middle c.

i'm also talking about the zoo just down the street near low d.

i haven't opened the bench because i really have no idea what to expect. but i'd like you to know that i dusted around all of it because i wouldn't have it any other way. plus i don't want to disrupt the wildlife.

this hippo looks pretty vicious, don't you think?

for the record, those are either polly pockets or squinkies. whatever they are, finding them today made me smile.

i wonder what gems i'll find tomorrow.

peace...

delirious nostalgia

2011-08-04T21:00:00.002-05:00

sea world: we came, we saw, we conquered. and the girls successfully earned rights to a t-shirt that says, 'i sat in the splash zone (four times) and didn't even get wet.'

that's gotta be a record right? it was hot, we had tons of fun, and i have never wanted so badly for a whale to completely drench me with its tail-splashing antics.

it just didn't happen.

but this made it completely worth the effort because they were captivated from the front row...

i had a great time with three of my favorite ladies and we made some great memories.

i got back home to a new trend on facebook. something about 'you know you're from ______ when _____.' funny, slightly nostalgic, and memorable. i'm from a tiny small town in west texas, but not the west texas where el paso or ft. davis are...i'm from the west texas closer to lubbock, and it really isn't quite as west so much as it is a little bit north.

it was so fun looking back at what everyone wrote about our fabulous little slice of heaven, and even though i had hoped to give you a top ten list, i realized it was probably kind of generic when compared to other small towns in texas. therefore, i proudly present to you my top one list. here is the one thing that i think sets my small, 'west' texas town apart from other small texas towns:

1. we had a boot legger named one-legged mary (there's only one way to get that exact nickname).

that's all. :)

i felt like the charlie sheen of insomnia today (minus the gold teeth). i got zero sleep last night. or the night before. or the night before that. and probably the one before that, too, but i've officially lost count. why is sleep playing the elusive game with me? i didn't sign up for this, and i would really like to opt out of this whole 'how long can you stay awake' episode.

in the midst of my awakeness last night (or was it this morning?), i swear a commercial was taunting me. some person was singing praises about a fabulous new sleep product called alteril and practically gloating to me about how wonderfully it could make a person sleep. who does that at 4 in the morning? it's just not right.

i didn't google it last night because i really thought sleep was going to take charge at any moment (it didn't), and this morning when i found the website, i realized that i'd first have to order it and then wait approximately two days (at best) for it to arrive.

because i need sleep muy pronto, i'm putting lots of stock into this little combo instead:

did you ever see failure to launch? zooey deschanel plays kit, and at one point she says, 'i want to sleep, but i can't...'

she goes on to tell us that there's a bird outside her window (a mockingbird), and that's precisely where our commonality ends.

there's no bird outside my window...and i'm not sure why i can't sleep. but it's driving me completely crazy because i really, really want to sleep.

speaking of birds, do you remember my bird nest from june? well, my sweet friend jftb told me not to knock it down because the birds would come back year after year for as long as it's attached to my porch. guess what!!

a) she was right, and b) there is a fresh new batch of babies in it as we speak!

i learned my lesson last time, and i'm not going to paparazzi them this time...so please trust me when i tell you that they are in the midst of their 'two days of cute' phase as we speak. i don't want to unnecessarily rush them into their 'let's flee the nest' stage.

alright...it's time.

come on, sleep...let's do this.

peace...

whales, insomnia and running records

2011-08-01T20:04:00.003-05:00

i'm on the very downhill side of my second grad school class. this one seemed to go by a lot quicker than the first, and although i'm really, really ready for school to start, i'm worried my time management super powers are going to slap me square in the face somewhere around the first week of september.

in the last four weeks, i have used about 40 different literacy assessment tools and written five literacy reports on different aspects of literacy acquisition (well, i'm almost done with the fifth one - i'm going to read it one more time before i submit it) to prove that i'm a competent, wise and worthy assessor.

i am slightly delirious. it seems that my new fun 'habit' is to just not sleep the night before a major assignment is due. it's not that i'm staying up all night trying to figure things out or organize the paper in my mind. it's just that i simply can't sleep. eyes-wide-open, staring-at-the-ceiling, painfully *awake*. ugh.

therefore today i have been a walking zombie.

on the bright side, i have a two week break before my next class starts.

tomorrow we are heading south for a couple of days of fun in the sun and quality time with shamu and crew. i think i'm more excited than the girls. a sleep-deprived me is not a good thing, and i hope i can catch plenty of zzz's tonight so i'll be able to match their off-the-charts energy.

i'm hoping we'll get to do a little hill country shopping, too, but i haven't told the girls that part...yet.

their bags are packed (although i haven't done the last-minute dummy check...i do this because 6 times out of 10, jay packs nothing but stuffed animals and diet cokes), i have my packing list made, and the bachelorette finale is on.

overheard during their packing conversation:
jay: cee, why do you have a ball of yarn and tape in your bag? do you really think you'll need that?
cee: well, it's just that you never know. we might see casey anthony.

as always, she makes a good point.

(add another reason to the list of why i do dummy checks)

peace and...sweet, restful dreams...

sometimes it's necessary to kill trees

2011-07-29T21:24:00.004-05:00

i know some people cringe when they go to their favorite store in search of a deeply discounted end-of-summer cooler and find that the goggles, beach towels, aloe and citronella candles have, along with the coolers, abandoned their aisles and have been replaced with mountains of back-to-school necessities. they are shocked and mortified by the mere sight of notebook paper, pens, crayons, paper clips, folders and markers.

i am the exact polar opposite of those people. i have a crazy affection for things that belong on, in, or near a desk. it doesn't even have to be a classroom desk. pretty much any kind of desk will work because i love, love, love school supplies!

'i would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if i knew your name and address.' ~joe fox

picture from etsy

i love that joe fox wanted to send kathleen kelly sharpened pencils in you've got mail (because unsharpened pencils simply have less credibility than sharpened ones - duh). i also really loved kathleen kelly's brownstone in that movie and after watching it five plus times in the theater, i wanted to own a children's bookstore and move to the upper west side...but let's not rehash the late 90s right now.

in honor of school supply lists, joe fox's subtle romantic tendencies, and the fact that i made a binding pinky promise to two cutie pies (that included lunch), today we tackled round one of this year's school supply shopping.

i think i'm passing along my love of school supplies to the girls, and i am perfectly comfortable with that. i am also okay with the fact that jay's first pick in the wide-ruled spiral notebook division was glee-themed. cee's first round pick was equally as fabulous because although it was justin bieber, she had full intentions of defacing him prior to the first day of school.

luckily, she was easily dissuaded from her premeditated vandalism efforts.

i was a little baffled that they picked the same backpack, and i have learned that some things are just not worth questioning.

for the last three years, i have secretly embraced the beginning of the school year as a welcoming mat for something almost as fabulous as school supplies: fantasy football!!

the nfl is back in business, ochocinco and tom brady are spending some quality time together playing catch, i'm sure there are tons more surprises just waiting to announce themselves, and (thankfully) fantasy football will continue to be a staple in my life for at least one more season. i was seriously not going to be happy if football didn't happen this year.

alright - that's all the football lingo i can possibly muster for may, june and july. it's time to call it a night in the exciting world of 'me.'

peace and patriots...

p.s. - last year, i won.

candle ♥

2011-07-27T18:57:00.002-05:00

i am madly, deeply in love with this candle:

i know, i know...it's illume. i'm pretty sure that's so 7 years ago because i remember watching the newlyweds and jessica bought a carload of illume candles on valentine's day.

i really loved that show.

and i really love this frangrance.

honeysuckle. orange flower. chamomile.

how can you go wrong with that combo?

i love the vanilla amber fragrance equally as much.

warm vanilla. golden amber. orange blossom.

heavenly.

okay, i just wanted to let you know.

that's all.

peace...

propane: rules of engagement

2011-07-27T13:35:00.041-05:00

last week, it became necessary to tackle one of those 'i can do this on my own without anybody's help...' situations. i have an unofficial list of those (changing a tire is on it...twice, as is killing a scorpion), and i am always giddy when i can add to it.

i found myself at a point in my life where it became necessary to change the propane tank on my grill so i could continue to eat yummy grilled squash. i've never had to do this on my own before, and i was bound and determined. i thought i'd share with you a few of the things i learned.

1. it is helpful to own a pair of pliers (the real kind, not the jewelry kind) to unhook a tank.

2. metric fittings don't go 'righty, tighty; lefty, loosey.'

3. it isn't permissible to put your empty tank into a grocery basket and wheel it through the store while you shop. who knew?

4. nobody will steal your empty tank if you leave it outside of the grocery store while you pay for the new one (contrary to a belief that apparently holds limited popularity).

5. you should not be overly concerned that the propane tank will be too hot in your trunk for the ride home - they sit safely in the 100 degree temperatures all day long, day in and day out.

6. thankfully, someone anticipated people like me who wouldn't be able to reassemble the tank to the grill and precautionary boobie traps were included.

7. the 'righty, tighty; lefty, loosey' bit stays the same when you reattach the tank, and you can't actually use your grill until this little misnomer has been removed from your quick-reference mental flip chart.

so there you have it. seven simple tips for changing out a propane tank (the abridged version).

thank you for reading my story, i hope you enjoyed it.

the end.

fishing for progress

2011-07-24T20:13:00.003-05:00

yesterday, we made our way into austin for some fabulous fun. the proverbial country mice wanted to check out life in the city. i knew we would have fun, but i had no idea what a mess we would create.

after a great afternoon and a lovely dinner, we made our way to the shores of lady bird lake. i was bound and determined to take them fishing. i love fishing, and i was convinced that this was something i could do with them...just the three of us, no problemo.

on the way down to the shore, jay found a frog and she really wanted to take him with us. cee and i told her that he probably wouldn't be much help, and we convinced her that we'd see him on our way back up. this was jay's first fishing trip, so it was pretty easy to convince her that this was how fishing worked.

before we headed down to fish, we agreed that none of us wanted to touch worms, so instead we decided to use gummy products for bait. jay decided she wanted gummy worms. once upon a time (a long, long time ago), i caught a ton of striped bass on lake powell using nothing but gummy worms. respectable choice.

cee went with sour belts. another bold choice.

there was also a very curious squirrel who wanted to see what we were up to (too curious for his own good, if you ask me).

by the time we actually got our lines in the water, the lighting was perfect. i love the lighting at sunset and i don't have too many opportunities to snap the girls in this light.

we had front row seats to watch the bats spray into the sky, too.

and aside from the constant hustle to remind one girl to twirl her line in while casting for the other girl while telling the other one to duck (just in case i missed the water) while reminding them both not to point their poles to the sky (and then rinse and repeat), it was pretty close to being a picture perfect night.

oh wait.

that's not entirely true.

remember the curious squirrel? well, there may have been a point in our evening when i was casting for jay and cee was waiting (with her locked and loaded sour belt pole) for me to cast her line back out. the too-curious-for-his-own-good squirrel may or may not have found the dangling bait too much to bear, the squirrel may or may not have gotten himself tangled in her line, and we may or may not have panicked (all four of us).

my reflexes were lightening fast, though. i had two choices: i could attempt to help the squirrel (which, given his state of agitation, seemed an unlikely option) or i could help my first born (she was basically holding onto a rabid, angry, frustrated squirrel).

obviously i opted for my first born...i released her line, broke the line...and prayed that the squirrel would bolt up a tree and not make a beeline towards us.

luck was definitely on our side, and after the squirrel, our bobber, hook, and sour belt were safely up the tree, we decided to call it a night.

jay was the first to break the silence (which i still haven't qualified as stunned, shocked, mortified, or terrified). 'guys. i didn't even know you could catch a squirrel with a fishing pole! this is the best fishing trip of my whole life!'

as it turns out, we are not the first ones to catch a squirrel with a fishing pole. my sheer guilt guided me to google it, and as it turns out, there's an actual sport called squirrel fishing. this is obviously not what we set out to do, but i'm guessing that the sport started after an incident similar to ours.

on our walk back up from the shore, two things happened. a) we saw our frog friend in the exact same place as he had been before ('we told you so'), and b) i told the girls not to publicly announce to anyone that we caught a squirrel because i was pretty sure it wasn't legal. for some reason, this made them laugh ridiculously hard.

as we got into our car, i told them that this was called 'making memories.'

jay piped in, 'no, mom. this is called making progress!'

cee added, 'ummm...actually, this is called making frogress.'

we howled.

a good time was had by all (and i'm not speaking on behalf of the squirrel...).

peace and frogress...

a simple case of mistaken identity

2011-07-22T22:29:00.001-05:00

the girls took a two hour nap today. they haven't both done this at the same time in approximately...

well...

hmmmm...

...i don't think they have done this since they were in diapers.

they fell asleep in my room, so i made good use of my time (for once in my life) and finished my assignments for today and tomorrow (woo hoo!) while they were sleeping.

mere moments after i cyber-turned it this week's proof of reading and responding and replying, i heard whispering and very quiet and muffled giggles. i walked in and sang, 'buenos tardes, mis dolce amores!!'

usually when i greet them in spanish, they beam and hug me and kiss me and make me laugh. unless they're asleep, and then they groan and cover their heads with their pillows and blankets.

today their conversation and giggles came to a halting screech. or a screeching halt.

they looked at me...they were confused.

it was as if i had stomped on their toes or pulled their hair.

then their looks morphed to accusing.

'hey!!!!' one charged.

'where were you?!?!?' the other demanded.

'ummm - i was doing my homework...in the living room. why?'

'we have been awake for like hours but we were being quiet because we thought you were like sleeping.'

i looked at my bed, and it was quite deceivingly arranged.

but it didn't look like me at all.

it looked like someone much, much smaller than me!

i will be forever indebted to them for mistakenly thinking my body pillow was me.

it was good enough to make me skip my workout today.

my body pillow is probably mildly to moderately insulted, and that's alright for now.

they still don't realize the magnitude of their inadvertant compliment (it was huge).

peace and imposters...

a few digits

2011-07-21T20:35:00.009-05:00

3 - 2 - 1 - blast off...to rocket camp. that's what the girls have been up to this week, and they have loved it infinitely more than i would have imagined!

i think they've been surprised at how much fun it's been. they have an entirely new vocabulary now and effortlessly incorporate phrases like 'nose cone' and 'launch lug' and 'body tube' into casual conversation. it's impressive, really, and it's a good (and welcomed) change from phrases like 'butt face' or 'doo doo head' or 'elephant breath.' tomorrow is their last day of camp and i'm certain our afternoon won't be complete without purchasing them their own rocket kits.

four (4): that's how many seconds it took me to go from mortified to don't-make-eye-contact-with-anyone when i picked them up from rocket camp and realized that jay's outfit was not exactly the matching kind
(plaid + animal print = no bueno).

this is a reaction that i've become a lot better at since getting divorced. don't get me wrong - their dad is a pretty great dad, but sometimes...the outfits leave me with my jaw resting gently on the ground, and it's not easy to explain to complete strangers that you had nothing to do with their 'get-ready' routine for any given day (i speak from experience). today was one of those times, and i'm pretty proud of my expedited recovery rate. in another year, it won't even phase me.

i hope.

eleven (11): the number of days until we go on vacation.

twenty-five (25): the number of days until i officially go back to school (and we bid adieu to this summer).

seventeen (17): that is approximately how many times smarter my dog is than the metaphorical thorn in my side from the past year. the multiple was higher until i caught him drinking out of the toilet today. please don't tell morgan freeman about the toilet episode.

six (6): the number of feet i need at the pool to make me completely happy.

thirty-eight (38): the number of minutes it takes for two thirds of those feet to completely destroy their freshly-pedicured toes (i'm not exaggerating either). see?

but that's okay - it's hard being six. or eight, for that matter. polish-maintenance falls pretty low on the totem pole of things to worry about for them. that's how it should be: very few worries and lots of opportunities to play and laugh and be a kid.

speaking of totem poles, my dad was supposed to come for a visit this weekend, but he's sick and unable to make it.

three (3): the number of completely sad faces in my house when we learned the news that my dad wasn't going to be a part of our weekend plans.

eight (8): the number of years until this little photographic scenario becomes a legitimate liability.

one (1): the number of alleged spider sightings it takes to completely evacuate the vehicle in less than a nanosecond.

sixty (60): the number of minutes until i crawl into my bed and call it a night. it's been a long day filled with all kinds of good stuff!

we are going to enjoy every single moment of these last 25 days of summer vacation. you have my word.

peace and promises...

team spirit

2011-07-17T16:57:00.005-05:00

the first time i ever remember getting emotional for patriotic reasons was at the davis cup. it was 1992, i was a senior in high school, and we were in ft. worth. this was back in the hey day of tennis - team usa consisted of agassi, courier, mcenroe (yes, there were some verbal outbursts), and sampras. gorman was the coach, and lest you think i acutally remembered all of this without a little google help, you have seriously over-estimated my memory.

but here's the part that will never leave my mind - at the very end of the match, the crowd was a wild and wicked sea of red, white, and blue and even the swiss were waving their cute little red cross flags, and everyone - i mean everyone - was singing the national anthem so loud and proud! it was an incredible place to be and i was seriously flooded with emotion.

i'm not sure if it was specifically because we won, because of the overwhelming scene, or because i had decided that i was going to marry pete sampras. it could have been a combination of it all, but i'll never forget the moment.

what i'm not quite as proud to tell you is that my flooding emotions continued right into lee greenwood's tried and true 'proud to be an american,' but i feel like i'd be leaving out important details if i didn't tell you that part. do you have any idea how much he makes in royalties on july 4th each year? crazy, crazy cash.

lee greenwood aside, it was a pretty cool thing to experience.

pictures courtesy of http://tennisworld.typepad.com/tennisworld/2007/11/davis-cup-table.html

today the girls and i watched the finals of the world cup. i think because of my davis cup experience, i still get super involved when the usa plays on a world platform like they did today. i only started following the world cup during the last game against france, but what a great team of talented ladies!

picture courtesy of http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/multimedia/photo_gallery/1107/soccer-womens-world-cup-usa-team/content.26.html

before i sat down to write this post, i thought that i was really cheering for them from my heart because of their age - it's always impressive to me to see young athletes who exhibit so much soul on the field, court, or other arena. i wondered how old team usa was and i was surprised to find out that most of them are much older than i would have guessed! the co-captain is my age!! wow. i guess it's just good, old-fashioned patriotism that tugged at my heart strings today.

i'm totally bummed that they didn't win, completely proud of how hard they played, and glad the girls (and browning) had the opportunity to watch today's final.

the girls really got into it more than i thought they would, and cee even said, 'i want to be just like them one day.' jay may or may not have showed the t.v. her naked hiney whenever the match was over and we lost, but that's another story for another time.

we have a couple of friends whose kids are going to nationals for baseball and softball. there's a fundraiser for the softball girls tonight (they are the daughters of jay's kindergarten teacher) which means yummy ice cream for us! we're also sending out happy wishes of good luck to the baseball boys (cee's 1st grade teacher's son's team). it's all about pulling for your team, no matter the challenge they face.

go menace & go bulldogs!!

peace and patriotic moments...