helmets for horses

Saturday, October 20, 2012

okay, hold on - we're going to time travel real quick. ready?

september 3, 1994. texas tech v. new mexico. something big went awry, and the masked rider fell off of her perch atop a giant quarterhorse. double t went crazy. ultimately, the horse freaked out and its animal instincts chose flight over fight. when he made the turn up the ramp in the southwest corner of the endzone, he skidded and smacked into the concrete wall.

i was sitting with some of my college (and current) faves, one who grew up around horses. he said double t died instantly from blunt force head trauma...it was so gut wrenching to see the black tarp being drawn over that ramp. public death of a powerful, regal animal: not something you see too often.

as of this moment, i am extremely hoarse. i just spent the last few hours cheering (okay, fine - hollaring loudly and emphatically) for my red raiders. huge victory last week over west virginia. huge victory today over tcu (triple overtime!). we are now 3-1 in big 12 play.

some of my best memories from college center around texas tech football games.

and without fail, whenever i mention that i'm a texas tech alum, people always have horse jokes to share with me. it's almost as if i have an invisible slogan tatooed on my forehead inviting people to share their horse humor with me (for the record, i don't). usually their jokes aren't funny, but i oblige their comical attempts anyways to appease their faltering senses of humor. and plus, i don't like hurting people's feelings...you can take it for what it's worth.

however, i got one text today taunting my red raiders for their lackluster first half performance. i had a pretty witty comeback, but i couldn't compete with their reply.

it simply said, 'get your horse helmets ready.'

i'm not sure why that made me laugh so hard, but google it - maybe you'll laugh too?

photo credit
in a world filled with animal rights activists and human rights activists {i saw a garage sale sign today that said 'garage sale - proceeds benefit human trafficking'.....sorry, but i need some clarification. are we supporting it or are we against it? i'm gonna need to know because one of your neighbors has starbucks at their garage sale, and the other has beer...serious garage sale competition...let me know when you make up your mind...i'll either be wired or asleep}, you would think we'd be a little further ahead of ourselves.

in a world where we are bombarded with commercials about the ethical treatment of animals, why on earth haven't we invented a helmet for horses who are bound, at some point in their sweet equine lives, to go slightly postal and challenge a cement wall head-first?

because we are the wiser species, we know the cement wall will win nine point nine times out of ten; but the horse does not know this.

and that's why horses need helmets.

we have political yard signs. we have garage sale activist signs (albeit with high levels of ambiguity - is there a limit on how many cups of coffee or mugs of beer i can have?). we tell people not to loiter, and we beg of them not to solicit. so why don't we have animal activist signs? if we don't speak out for protective head gear for horses, who will?

maybe this is my million dollar idea.

just maybe.

i'd hoped to save the world in other ways, but i won't deny my true calling in life a great opportunity when it comes my way. :)


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