love and loss

Saturday, March 3, 2012

walter...what an experience.

we had just over two wonderful months with him...and then, out of nowhere last sunday, he bit cee.

he didn't break her skin, but within a minute of the bite, she had two ridiculously huge bruises that within an hour were deep knots in her thigh. we gave her lots of love and ice and advil, but the problem of walter biting wasn't something that could be ignored.

from the second i saw her alligator tears and bruises, i knew he had to go.

i can tell you the night of that bite was the most tear-filled night i've experienced as a mom. the girls cried and wailed. they begged for me to give him one more chance. they pleaded to the point that my heart literally broke and i was a mess of tears right along with them.

i reminded them that my number one job as their mom is to keep them safe and to protect them from harm, even if what i'm doing doesn't make sense to them at the time. it's all about trust.

not all kids have moms who uphold this promise, and i have been very lucky to have been surrounded by strong female role models all of my adult life who have constantly reinforced this concept to the people they love through their words and actions.

some of my mom friends remind me during difficult times like this that you can't take any chances with your kids. period (thank you, mama o).

when i was a kid, this wasn't the adage at the heart of my household. it was actually quite the opposite for me.

sometimes, decisions like this take me back to my childhood (which was relatively rocky and dependably unpredictable). i'm a very resilient person because of those experiences, and at the same time, i am filled with more than the usual amount of pride whenever i can step back from a situation and know i've made strong, positive decisions for my girls.

no matter what, i always keep their best interests in the forefront of my heart and all the decisions i make...because how could you not?

walter will soon have a wonderful new home, browning is secretly beaming to be an only dog again (as in glowing and bubbly), and although it might be a hard adjustment for the girls, i think they'll rest a little easier, too.

i have some of pioneer woman's jalepeno poppers in the oven (because bacon makes everything better), my assignments are done (despite all of my procrastination efforts last night), and juno is coming on soon. happy saturday to me!

i hope you have a wonderful weekend, too.


1 comment :

Mama O. said...

You did your job, hon. Well done, grasshopp-ah, well done.

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